Toothpaste For REAL Men!
Local Golf Club Sign
This sign was posted at a local golf club
1. Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
2. Form a loose grip.
3. Keep your head down.
4. Avoid a quick back swing.
5. Stay out of the water.
6. Try not to hit anyone.
7. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you.
8. Don’t stand directly in front of others.
9. Quiet please… while others are preparing to go.
10. Don’t take extra strokes.
Well done. Now flush the urinal, go outside, and tee off!
1930s Marital Rating Scale
Would you fail if you were a 1930s husband or wife?
When we get glimpses of the way things used to be back before the divorce rate climbed to one in three, whether it’s a scene from Mad Men or the charts presented here, we try not to think that this might have been the way things were for our grandparents and great-grandparents — that marriage was a kind of pleasant business partnership in which both partners walked a fine line between cheerful (he) and deferential (she). Would my great-grandfather have really been disappointed if his wife “put her cold feet” on him at night “to warm them”? Then again, can I even imagine my great-grandmother putting her cold feet on him at night to warm them? Nope.
Of course, the saddest thing about these charts, which were created from surveys of real men and women of the 1930s by Scientific Marriage Foundation founder George Crane, is that the answers are so different. I don’t suspect my female forebears had a craving for red nail polish, but it is comforting to think that these days, fewer and fewer people would even blink at the sight of anyone wearing any color of nail polish, least of all red. Nor would they necessarily mind if a woman had crooked seams in her hose, or if she didn’t “dress for breakfast.” These small fashion statements speak loudly of how times have changed.
As for the men’s chart, it’s particularly depressing that women wanted men to read aloud newspapers, books, and magazines to them, and it makes you wonder whether we’re about to find out about some horrible Way Things Were, like that women weren’t required to learn how to read in school, but no one has let on until now because they thought it would make us sad.
There are a couple of things listed here that will always stay the same. For one, it’s still not fashionable to be “jealous” or “suspicious.” Too bad.
Joke Of The Day
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to “Please be gentle; I’m still a Virgin.”
“What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”
“Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
“Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he’d look into it and get back with me.
“Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.
“Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.
“Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.
“Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.
“Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it…
“Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
“Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
“Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was lick it….. God I miss him.
“But now that I’ve married you, I’m so excited.”
“Wonderful”, said the husband, “but why?
“You’re with the ” GOVERNMENT ” ……..This time I KNOW I’M gonna get screwed.”
Allen West Challenges Conservative Mothers: ‘Spartan Women… Raise Spartan Men’
Transcript:
But when you understood what made the Spartan men strong, it was the Spartan women. Because the Spartan women at the age of nine gave up their male sons. And their male sons went into a training that was called the Agoge and they stayed in that training for the next eleven to twelve years. And when they were finally qualified, when they were finally ready to join the ranks for the Spartan army, it was not their father who gave them their cloak and shield. It was their mother who gave them their shield. And when the Spartan mother gave that young Spartan warrior his shield, she gave him this basic commandment: “Spartan, here is your shield. Come back bearing this shield or being borne upon it!”
When Queen Gorgo, wife of King Leonidas, was questioned by the Persian emissary and she somewhat spoke out of turn to this Persian emissary, he tried to rebuke her. And she looked at him and said “Persian, beware, for it is Spartan women who raise Spartan men.”


