Joke Of The Day

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Jun 192011
 

Sam and Abe, now in their eighties, first met in grade school. Their relationship now is playing cards, playing jokes and making bets.

One day Sam calls Abe and says, “I bet you that mine is longer soft than yours is hard. A thousand dollars…”

Abe replies, “How can that be? If you know anything about biology you….”

Sam interrupts, “I called for a bet, not a lecture. Mine is longer soft than yours is hard. A thousand dollars… YES OR NO?”

Abe says, “OK, OK. I’ll take that bet. How long is yours soft?”

Sam answers, “Eleven years!”

Joke Of The Day

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Jun 182011
 

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“Hunting Flies” He responded.

“Oh. Killing any?” She asked.

“Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,” he replied.

Intrigued, she asked. “How can you tell?”

He responded, “3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.”

Joke Of The Day

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Jun 112011
 

There was a middle-aged couple that had two stunningly beautiful teenage daughters. They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. After months of trying, the wife finally became pregnant, and sure enough, delivered a healthy baby boy nine months later.

The joyful father rushed into the nursery to see his new son. He took one look and was horrified to see the ugliest child he had ever seen.

He went to his wife and said that there was no way he could be the father of that child.

“Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered!” Then he gave her a stern look and asked, “Have you been fooling around on me?”

The wife just smiled sweetly and said, “Not this time”!

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