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A man was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You are beautiful.” Then he fell asleep again.
His wife had never heard him say that, so she stayed by his side. A few minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said, “You are cute!” The wife was disappointed because instead of “beautiful,” it was now “cute.” She said, “What happened to ‘beautiful’?” Her husband replied, “The drugs are wearing off!” |
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A man was shocked to see his beautiful divorced neighbor knocking on his door one Friday evening.
“I’m feeling so lonely that I can’t stand it.” she said. “I want to go out, get drunk & want to enjoy my life. Are you free tonight?” “Yes!” he replied enthusiastically. “Wonderful.” she said. “Would you watch my kids? |
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With a very seductive voice, a wife asked her husband “Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?”
“No” said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile unbuttoned top three buttons of her blouse and slowly reached down in her cleavage created by a soft, silky push up bra and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill. He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly. She then asked “Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?” “No I haven’t” he said, an anxious tone in his voice. She gave him another sexy little smile pulled up her skirt, seductively reached into her tight sheer panties and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill. He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started breathing a little quicker with anticipation. “Now” she said “Have you ever seen 50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?” “No way” he said becoming even more aroused and excited to which she replied: “Go look in the garage.” |