Joke Of The Day

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Dec 262010
 

An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few minutes the old man farts and says,”Seven Points.”

His wife rolls over and says, “What in the world was that?”

The old man replied, “It’s fart football!”

A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says -“Touchdown, tie score!”

After about five minutes the old man farts again and says “Touchdown, I’m ahead 14 to 7!”

Not to be out done the wife rips another one and says, “Touchdown, tie score!”

Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeaker and says “Field goal, I lead 17 to 14!”

Now the pressures on and the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he has but instead of farting he poops the bed.

The wife looks and says, “What the heck was that?”

The old man replied, “Half-time, Switch sides!”

Joke Of The Day

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Dec 052010
 

A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.

‘Oh, I really liked it,’ she replied, ‘especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.’

Dumbfounded, her date asked, ‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like…Helloooooo? It’s only 25 cents!

High School Football Player Penalized For Gesture to God

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Dec 032010
 

Would he have been penalized if he was pointing towards Allah?

In the second quarter of the game, Tumwater running back Ronnie Hastie scored on a 23-yard run, took a knee in the end zone and briefly pointed to the heavens above. For that the referee threw a flag, saying it was unsportsmanlike conduct.