Tag: Suicide
Joke Of The Day
There was this man who lost one of his arms in an accident. He became very depressed because he had loved to play guitar and a lot of things that took two arms.
One day he could not stand it anymore. He decided to commit suicide. He got on an elevator and went to the top of a tall building to jump off.
He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man on the sidewalk below skipping along whistling and kicking up his heels. He looked closer and noticed this man didn’t have any arms at all.
He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I still have one good arm to do things with. There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk happy and going on with his life.
He hurried down and caught the man with no arms. He told him how glad he was to see him because he had lost one of his arms and felt ugly, useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him again for saving his life and he now knew he could make it with one arm if that guy could do it with no arms.
The man with no arms began dancing and whistling and kicking up his heels again.
He asked “Why are you so happy anyway?”
He said “I’m NOT happy; my ass itches.”
Random Riddle
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| Hold your mouse over for the answer. |
A man was found dead in his study. He was slumped over his desk and a gun was in his hand. There was a cassette recorder on his desk. When the police entered the room and pressed the play button on the tape recorder they heard: “I can’t go on. I have nothing to live for.” Then there was the sound of a gunshot. How did the detective immediately know that the man had been murdered and it wasn’t a suicide?
Why Muslims Like to Commit Suicide
Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide.
Let’s see now…
No Jesus
No Christmas
No television
No cheerleaders
No naked women
No car races
No NFL football
No pork BBQ
No hot dogs
No burgers
No chocolate chip cookies
No lobster
No nachos
No Beer Nuts
No Beer!!!!!!!!
• Rags for clothes and towels for hats
• Constant wailing from the guy next door because he’s sick and there are no doctors
• Constant wailing from the Imam guy in the tower
• More than one wife
• You can’t shave
• Your wives can’t shave
• You can’t shower to wash off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel shit.
• Your bride is picked by someone else
• She smells just like your donkey
• Then they tell you that when you die it all gets better! 72 Virgins in Paradise?
I mean, really, is there actually a surprising mystery here?
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