JokesComments Off on Joke Of The Day: A Tasty Soup
Sep132015
After his recent stay in the hospital, Grandpa was particularly irritable, especially regarding food. At a nearby restaurant he stopped for a quick meal and the waiter provided a bowl of soup.
As the waiter turned away to return to the kitchen Grandpa stopped him, calling: “Waiter!”
“Yes ,sir, is there something wrong?”
“The soup. Taste it,” replied Grandpa.
“I beg your pardon, Sir?”
“Taste it.”
“But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent.”
“Taste it,” Grandpa persisted.
“Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients.”
“Taste it!”
The exasperated waiter finally relented. “All right, Sir, I’ll taste it.” Then after a pause he said, “Where is the spoon?”
JokesComments Off on Joke Of The Day: Sharing Everything
Aug022015
He ordered only one hamburger, only one order of French fries and only one drink. The old man unwrapped the plain hamburger, carefully cut it in half, and placed one half in front of his wife.
He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. Then he put the drink cup on the table, exactly half-way between him and his wife.
As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them kept looking over and whispering. You could tell they were thinking, “That poor old couple… all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.”
As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table. He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said they were just fine. “We are used to sharing everything,” he said simply.
The surrounding people noticed the little old lady hadn’t eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat.
Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them. This time it was the old woman who said, “No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything.”
As the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man yet again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked, “OK, but what is it you are waiting for?”
She paused a bit before she answered, as if it were quite obvious, “the teeth!”
Got a letter from Grandma the other day. She writes…
The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a “honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.
Boy, I’m glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed! I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is… and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed! I found that LOTS of people love Jesus!
Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, “For the love of GOD! GO! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!” What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!
Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the celebration. There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a “sunny beach”…
I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. Then I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well, I’ve never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing… why, even he was enjoying this religious experience!
A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection.
I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again. I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.
