9-Year Old Told By Librarian To Step Aside And Let Other Kids Win

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Aug 292013
 

In Obama’s America we punish those who work hard to achieve something and reward those who don’t.

“If you’re not first, you’re last,” the popular phrase by character Ricky Bobby in the film “Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby,” is being changed to “If you’re first too much, we will make you last” in some parts of the country. Over the past few years, adults are punishing children for succeeding in the supposed name of fairness so that losing kids are being propped up as “winners.”

Take for example 9-year old Hudson Falls, NY resident Tyler Weaver who read 63 books this summer to win the title of top reader of the Hudson Falls Library reading program. Since he was in kindergarten, Tyler has won every competition, a total of 373 books in 5 years. But Tyler’s winning streak might come to an end if library director Marie Gandron has her way.

According to ABC News 10 in New York, Ms. Gandron feels that Tyler needs to recuse himself from future competitions to give other children a chance to win. The contest rules state that, “each child is required to read books at their grade level, and once the child completes the book, a librarian quizzes them on the content to make sure they actually read the book.”

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Boston Hero

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Aug 102013
 

Two boys in Boston were playing basketball when one of them was attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy picked up a board lying nearby, wedged it into the dog’s collar and twisted it, breaking the dog’s neck and thus ending the attack. His friend was saved.

A newspaper reporter from the Boston Globe witnessed the incident and rushed over to interview the boy. Realizing he had less than 20 minutes to get the story entered for the next edition, the reporter began entering the story into his laptop as he did the interview, beginning with the headline:

Brave Young Celtics Fan Saves Friend From Jaws Of Vicious Animal

“But I’m not a Celtics fan,” interjected the little hero, looking over the reporter’s shoulder as he typed.

“Sorry,” replied the reporter, “but since we’re in Boston, I just assumed you were.”

Hitting the delete key, the reporter replaced the head:

John Kerry Supporter Rescues Friend From Horrific Dog Attack

“I don’t like Kerry either,” the boy responds.

“Huh,” the reporter says. “I assumed everybody in this state was either for the Celtics, Kerry or Kennedy. OK, then, what team or person do you like?”

“I’m a Houston Rockets fan and I really like George W. Bush,” the boy says.

Hitting the delete key, the reporter began again:

Arrogant Conservative Bastard Kills Beloved Family Pet

 

Joke Of The Day: Would I Get Into Heaven?

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Jul 172013
 

Rubber ChickenA Sunday school teacher asked the children in her class, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would I get into Heaven?”

“No!” the children all answered.

“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would I get into Heaven?”

Again the answer was “No!”

“Well”, she continued, “then how can I get into Heaven?”

A five-year-old boy shouted out, “You gotta be dead!”

 

 

Teenagers And Cats

 Amusing, Funny, Jokes  Comments Off on Teenagers And Cats
Jul 032013
 

For all of you with teenagers or who had teenagers, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats:

1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.

2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.

3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

4. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.

5. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

 

Joke Of The Day: Now What?

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Jul 032013
 

Rubber ChickenA preacher was walking down the street when he notices a little boy trying to ring the doorbell but it’s just out of his reach.

He watches his efforts for some time and walks over to press the the bell.

After he pressed it he leveled down to the boy and asked’ “Now what?” to which the boy turned and shouted, “NOW WE RUN!!”