Joke Of The Day: The Cat

Rubber ChickenOne day, a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven, where he meets the Lord Himself.

The Lord says to the cat, “You lived a good life, and if there is any way I can make your stay in heaven more comfortable, please let me know.”

The cat thinks for a moment and says, “Lord, all my life I have lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor.”

The Lord stops the cat and says, “Say no more,” and a wonderful, fluffy pillow appears.

A few days later, six mice are killed in a tragic farming accident, and all of them go to heaven.

Again, the Lord is there to greet them with the same offer.

The mice answer, “All our lives we have been chased.

We have had to run from cats, dogs, and even women with brooms.

Running, running, running; we’re tired of running.

Do you think we could have roller skates so that we don’t have to run anymore?”

The Lord says, “Say no more” and fits each mouse with beautiful new roller skates.

Week later, the Lord stops by to see the cat and finds him snoozing on the pillow.

The Lord gently wakes the cat and asks him, “How are things since you got here?”

The cat stretches and yawns, then replies, “It is wonderful here.

Better than I could have ever expected. And those ‘Meals On Wheels’ you’ve been sending by are the best!”

 

 

Which Came First, The Chicken or the Egg?

If you believe in God, this age-old question really has a simple answer. According to the Creator of chickens, and the author of the Record of their origins, chickens came first. It was on the Fifth Day of Creation:

“And God created great whales and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind; and God saw that it was good.”.

ARVE Error: need id and provider

It has perplexed humanity from as early as the Ancient Greeks. So which came first, the chicken or the egg? We take a crack at this curious conundrum.

 

Joke Of The Day: Drawing God

Rubber ChickenA Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”

The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.”

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, “They will in a minute.”
 

 

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