Joke Of The Day: An Italian Girl

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Oct 032014
 
Rubber Chicken A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport.

“Thank you, honey,” she says. “What would you like me to bring back for you?”

He laughs and says, “An Italian girl!”

When the conference is over, he meets her at the airport and asks, “So, honey, how was the trip?”

“Very good,” she replies.

”And what happened to my present?”

“Which present?” she says.

“The one I asked for an Italian girl!”

“Oh, that,” she says. “Well, I did what I could. Now we have to wait nine months to see if it’s a girl.”

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Founder’s Day

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Oct 012014
 
Rubber Chicken It was the founder’s day at the Asian Heart institute, a reputed hospital specializing in heart diseases.

Dr. Robert Smith had been invited to be the chief guest and to deliver a speech on healthy living. During his speech, Dr Smith said, “The things that we eat can end our lives. Aerated drinks corrode our bodies, red meat is dangerous for the heart, Chinese food is full of sodium, our drinking water has bacteria, high fat foods have dangerous impacts over a period of time. However, there is one food that we have all relished and which can cause the highest level of damage. Can anyone seated here tell me what is that food which can cause anguish and misery for years after eating it.

There was silence in the audience, till the time a very old gentleman slowly raised his hand and replied, “Wedding cake.”

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Walking On The Grass

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Sep 292014
 
Rubber Chicken The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.

The instructor said, “Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you.

Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier.

Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surface like grass or a path.”

“Gentlemen, remember — you’re in this together. It wouldn’t hurt you to go walking with her. In fact, that shared experience would be good for you both.”

The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this information. After a few moments a man, name unknown, at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand.

“Yes?” said the Instructor.

“I was just wondering if it would be all right, if she carries a golf bag while we walk?”

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Watching TV

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Sep 282014
 
Rubber Chicken An elderly couple was at home watching TV.

The husband had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel.

His wife became more and more annoyed and finally said: “For god’s sake, Leave it on the porn channel. You know how to fish!”