Joke Of The Day: Showing Off The Sports Car

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Mar 262018
 
Joke Of The Day: Showing Off The Sports Car A young man was showing off his sports car to his girlfriend.

She was thrilled at the speed. “If I do 200 mph, will you take off your clothes?” he asked. “Yes!” said his adventurous girlfriend. And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes. Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over.

The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.

“Go and get help!” he cried.

“But I can’t. I’m naked and my clothes are gone!”

“Take my shoe”, he said, “and cover yourself.”

Holding the shoe over her private parts, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, “Please help me! My boyfriend’s stuck!”

The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, “There’s nothing I can do… he’s gone in too far.”

 

 

 

 

An Irish Blonde

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Mar 252018
 

An Irish Blonde

An attractive blonde from Cork, Ireland, arrived at the casino. She seemed a little intoxicated and bet twenty thousand dollars in a single roll of the dice.She said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude.” with that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, “Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!”

As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed. “Yes! Yes! I won, I won!” She hugged each of the dealers, picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.

The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded.

Finally, one of them asked, “What did she roll?” The other answered, “I don’t know – I thought you were watching.”

MORAL OF THE STORY

Not all Irish are drunks, not all blondes are dumb,…. but all men…are men!

 

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