The Benefits Of Being Over 40

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May 242015
 

The Benefits Of Being Over 40

  • Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
  • People call at 9 PM and ask, “Did I wake you?”
  • People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
  • There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
  • You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.
  • You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.
  • You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
  • You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.
  • You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
  • You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
  • You sing along with elevator music.
  • Your eyes won’t get much worse.
  • Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
  • You can’t remember who sent you this list.

 

Joke Of The Day: Stillaguamish

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May 242015
 
Rubber Chicken A river n Washington State, a little north of Seattle, is a river called the Stillaguamish, but it wasn’t always called that. It was originally named “Aguamish” after a local Indian tribe.

When Lewis & Clark finally made their way to the west coast they came to the Aguamish tribe and met the chief who told them what the name of the river was and gave them a tour of the area.

Years later Merriweather Lewis returned and met the Aguamish chief again and the subject finally came around to the river:

“Chief, I’ve been told that, because of so many white men have arrived in the area, many of the rivers are being renamed because they couldn’t pronounce the names. Tell me, what is the name of your river now, please, ” Lewis pleaded.

“Oh,” replied the chief. “It’s Stillaguamish.”

 

 

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