Why It’s Easier To Raise Boys Than Girls

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Oct 282014
 

Why It's Easier To Raise Boys Than Girls

Why it’s easier to raise boys than girls:

1. Your kid is upset.
Buy your son a toy and he’s happy.
Buy your daughter a doll and she throws it at you.

2. Your kid gets into a fight at school and you ask why they did it.
Your son: The other kid started it.
Your daughter: I have so much going on in my life right now you have no idea.

3. You ask whats wrong?
Your son: Kid at school beat me up.
Your daughter: Did you ever hate your life?

4. You give your kid a complement, ie. you look good today.
Your son: Thanks.
Your daughter: Oh my god shut up!

5. You tell your kid to eat their food.
Your son: I’m full/I don’t want anymore.
Your daughter: I’m too fat./Food makes me sick.

6. Dad/Mom I want a…
Your son: New Video game/ toy/ TV
Your daughter: Pony, Jewellery.

7. When your kid is mad at you.
Your son: Storms out.
Your daughter: Systematically destroys you mentally.

8. You say “I’m worried about you”.
Your son: I’ll be fine.
Your daughter: You never trust me.

9. Misbehaving.
Your son: Learns curse words, breaks things, gets bad grades, disobeys instructions.
Your daughter: Emotional blackmail, spends all your money, plants emotional instabilities that will slowly be the cause of your nervous breakdown.

 

Rototiller Racing

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Oct 282014
 

If it has a motor and wheels, somebody will race it.

Do you have a rototiller? How fast does it go? How fast can you make it go?

If you can modify your tiller to go faster than any other and run behind it, holding onto the handlebars, for 200 feet, then you might have what it takes to be a rototiller racer.

The capital of this sport is Emerson, Arkansas. There, at annual PurpleHull Pea Festival, the champions assemble to find out who is the fastest rototiller racer.

As long as the engine doesn’t produce more than 50 horsepower, you can modify your tiller however you wish. Racers must run, not ride, their tillers for the entire race. They have to attach a kill switch to their wrists so that if they lose control of their tillers, they shut off automatically.

Shane Waller of Junction City, Arkansas holds the current record. He tilled the 200-foot field in just 5.59 seconds. That’s a speed of about 24 miles per hour.

Source…

 

Rototiller Racing

 

Random Riddle: 10-28-2014

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Oct 282014
 
I am seen at night but not at daylight. I have a long tail. My life is short but bright as a flashlight in the dark.

What am I?
 

Riddle

 

Joke Of The Day: One Kiss Per Yard

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Oct 282014
 
Rubber Chicken An attractive young woman approached the clerk at the department store’s fabric counter. “I would like to purchase some of this material for a new outfit. How much does it cost?” she asked.

“Only one kiss per yard,” the male clerk replied smugly.

“That’s fine,” she replied. “I’ll take six yards.”

With great expectation written all over his face, the clerk quickly measured out the fabric, wrapped it, then held it out teasingly.

The young woman snatched the package from his hand, pointed to the little old man standing next to her, and said with a grin, “Grandpa will pay the bill.”

 

 

50 Years Ago Today: Ronald Reagan – A Time for Choosing

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Oct 272014
 

Ronald Reagan’s famous speech turns 50 today. In the speech, Reagan appealed to what unites us. Politicians today appeal to what divides us.

Excerpted from “A Time for Choosing”

I am going to talk of controversial things. I make no apology for this.

It’s time we asked ourselves if we still know the freedoms intended for us by the Founding Fathers. James Madison said, “We base all our experiments on the capacity of mankind for self government.”

This idea—that government was beholden to the people, that it had no other source of power—is still the newest, most unique idea in all the long history of man’s relation to man. This is the issue of this election: Whether we believe in our capacity for self-government or whether we abandon the American Revolution and confess that a little intellectual elite in a far-distant capital can plan our lives for us better than we can plan them ourselves.

You and I are told we must choose between a left or right, but I suggest there is no such thing as a left or right. There is only an up or down. Up to man’s age-old dream–the maximum of individual freedom consistent with order—or down to the ant heap of totalitarianism. Regardless of their sincerity, their humanitarian motives, those who would sacrifice freedom for security have embarked on this downward path. Plutarch warned, “The real destroyer of the liberties of the people is he who spreads among them bounties, donations and benefits.”

The Founding Fathers knew a government can’t control the economy without controlling people. And they knew when a government sets out to do that, it must use force and coercion to achieve its purpose. So we have come to a time for choosing.

Public servants say, always with the best of intentions, “What greater service we could render if only we had a little more money and a little more power.” But the truth is that outside of its legitimate function, government does nothing as well or as economically as the private sector.

Yet any time you and I question the schemes of the do-gooders, we’re denounced as being opposed to their humanitarian goals. It seems impossible to legitimately debate their solutions with the assumption that all of us share the desire to help the less fortunate. They tell us we’re always “against,” never “for” anything.

We are for a provision that destitution should not follow unemployment by reason of old age, and to that end we have accepted Social Security as a step toward meeting the problem. However, we are against those entrusted with this program when they practice deception regarding its fiscal shortcomings, when they charge that any criticism of the program means that we want to end payments….

We are for aiding our allies by sharing our material blessings with nations which share our fundamental beliefs, but we are against doling out money government to government, creating bureaucracy, if not socialism, all over the world.

We need true tax reform that will at least make a start toward restoring for our children the American Dream that wealth is denied to no one, that each individual has the right to fly as high as his strength and ability will take him…. But we cannot have such reform while our tax policy is engineered by people who view the tax as a means of achieving changes in our social structure….

Have we the courage and the will to face up to the immorality and discrimination of the progressive tax, and demand a return to traditional proportionate taxation? . . . Today in our country the tax collector’s share is 37 cents of every dollar earned. Freedom has never been so fragile, so close to slipping from our grasp.

Are you willing to spend time studying the issues, making yourself aware, and then conveying that information to family and friends? Will you resist the temptation to get a government handout for your community? Realize that the doctor’s fight against socialized medicine is your fight. We can’t socialize the doctors without socializing the patients. Recognize that government invasion of public power is eventually an assault upon your own business. If some among you fear taking a stand because you are afraid of reprisals from customers, clients, or even government, recognize that you are just feeding the crocodile hoping he’ll eat you last.

If all of this seems like a great deal of trouble, think what’s at stake. We are faced with the most evil enemy mankind has known in his long climb from the swamp to the stars. There can be no security anywhere in the free world if there is no fiscal and economic stability within the United States. Those who ask us to trade our freedom for the soup kitchen of the welfare state are architects of a policy of accommodation.

They say the world has become too complex for simple answers. They are wrong. There are no easy answers, but there are simple answers. We must have the courage to do what we know is morally right. Winston Churchill said that “the destiny of man is not measured by material computation. When great forces are on the move in the world, we learn we are spirits–not animals.” And he said, “There is something going on in time and space, and beyond time and space, which, whether we like it or not, spells duty.”

You and I have a rendezvous with destiny. We will preserve for our children this, the last best hope of man on earth, or we will sentence them to take the first step into a thousand years of darkness. If we fail, at least let our children and our children’s children say of us we justified our brief moment here. We did all that could be done.

 

Ronald Reagan - A Time for Choosing