A cowboy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it’s a gay bar. “But what the heck,” he says to himself, I really want a drink.”
When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the cowboy, “What’s the name of your um, little friend?” The cowboy says, Look, I’m not into any of that. All I want is a drink.”
The gay waiter says, “I’m sorry but I can’t serve you until you tell me the name of your little friend. Mine for instance is called Nike, for the slogan ‘Just Do It.’ That guy down at the end of the bar calls his Snickers, because ‘It really Satisfies’.”
The cowboy looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over. So the cowboy asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, “Hey bud, what’s the name of yours?” The man looks back and says with a smile “TIMEX. You can guess why.”
A little shaken, the cowboy turns to two fella’s on his right and says, ” So, what do you guys call yours?”
The first man turns to him and proudly exclaims, “FORD, because Quality is Job One.” Then he adds, “Have you driven a Ford, lately?” The guy next to him then says, “I call mine CHEVY … Like A Rock!”.
The cowboy, desperate for a beer after weeks of riding on the trail, thinks for a minute.
Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, “The name of mine is Secret. Now give me my damn beer!”
The bartender begins to pour the cowboy a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, “Why Secret?”
The cowboy says, “Because it’s STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!”
Wow… 400 lbs and named Hersha. Where do I begin?
A Florida woman allegedly went ballistic on her roommate because she believed the woman had gobbled her Girl Scout cookies.
Hersha Howard was arrested Sunday after a battle royale that ravaged the entire apartment, according to police.
The 31-year-old Naples resident allegedly first attacked Jasmin Wanke around 1 a.m. while she was sleeping – launching an angry rant about missing Thin Mints, Wanke told authorities.
The chocolate-coated mint wafers are one of the most popular of the Girl Scout varieties, and are only available once a year.
The two argued about the cookies, then Wanke claims Howard – who according to the police report weighs 400 pounds – jumped on her and hit her in the face. They fought until Wanke’s husband pulled them apart.
Howard then allegedly chased after Wanke with a pair of scissors, police were told. Howard ditched the cutting implements, however, and instead picked up a board and whacked Wanke.
The fight moved into the kitchen, where Howard allegedly hurled her heft at Wanke again. As they fought, Howard bit Wanke’s breast and struck her several times.
Wanke’s husband once against separated the pair, and kept Howard restrained until cops arrived, police said.
Howard was charged with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon.
