Joke Of The Day

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Sep 202010
 

Two old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the town hall where a flower show was in progress.

One leaned over and said, “Life is so boring. We never have any fun anymore. For 5 dollars, I’d take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!”

“You’re on!” said the other old lady, holding up a 5 dollar bill.

The first fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked through the front door of the flower show.

Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause. The naked lady burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd.

“What happened?” asked her waiting friend.

“I won 1st prize as Best Dried Arrangement.”

Mayor “Hurricane Hazel” McCallion

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Sep 192010
 

Have you heard of “Hurricane Hazel” McCallion? She’s the 89-year-old mayor of the City of Mississauga, Ontario, Canada.

Mayor McCallion has been in office for over 31 years, winning election 11 consecutive times. The last election she earned a 92% majority of the votes. Her city is debt free; in fact, Hurricane Hazel has helped build a $700 million surplus.

Oh, and a few years ago, she was hit by a truck. She’s doing fine—the truck went in for repairs!

Enjoy!

Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Sep 192010
 

Bob goes to the Post Office to apply for a job.

The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?”

He replies, “Yes – coffee.”

“Have you ever been in the military service?

“Yes,” he says, “I was in Iraq for two years.”

The interviewer says,”That will give you 5 extra points towards employment.”
Then he asks,”Are you disabled in any way?”

Bob says,”Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both of my testicles.”

The interviewer grimaces and then says, “O.K. You’ve got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00 A.M. To 4:00 P.M. You can start tomorrow from 10:00 AM every day.”

Bob is puzzled and asks, “If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M., why do you want me to start here from10:00 A.M.?”

“This is a government job,” the interviewer says, “For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point you coming in for that.”

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