Heaven and Hell

 Amusing  Comments Off on Heaven and Hell
Aug 242010
 

In Heaven:

The cooks are French,
The policemen are English,
The mechanics are German,
The lovers are Italian,
The bankers are Swiss.

In Hell:

The cooks are English,
The policemen are German,
The mechanics are French,
The lovers are Swiss,
The bankers are Italian.

Joke Of The Day

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day
Aug 242010
 

Walking through San Francisco’s Chinatown, a tourist from the Midwest was enjoying the artistry of all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners when he turned a corner and saw a building with the sign “Moishe Plotnik’s Laundry.”

“Moishe Plotnik?” he wondered.

How does that belong in Chinatown ?

He walked into the shop and saw a fairly standard looking dry cleaner, although he could see that the proprietors were clearly aware of the uniqueness of the store name as there were baseball hats, T-shirts and coffee mugs emblazoned with the logo Moishe Plotnik’s Chinese Laundry.
The tourist selected a coffee cup as a conversation piece to take back to his office. Behind the counter was a smiling old Chinese gentleman who thanked him for his purchase.

The tourist asked, “Can you explain how this place got a name like Moishe Plotnik’s Laundry?”

The old man answered, “Ah..evleebody ask me dat. It name of owner.”

Looking around, the tourist asked, “Is he here now?”

“It me. Me him!” replied the old man.

“Really? You’re Chinese. How did you ever get a Jewish name like Moishe Plotnik?”

“It simple” said the old man. “Many, many year ago I come to this country. I standing in line at Documentation Center of Immigration. Man in front of me was Jewish man from Poland.”

Lady at counter look at him and say to him “What your name?”

He say to her, “Moishe Plotnik.”

Then she look at me and say, “What your name?”

I say, “Sam Ting.”

Iran Goes Nuclear, Obama Goes Swimming!

 Amusing  Comments Off on Iran Goes Nuclear, Obama Goes Swimming!
Aug 232010
 

I think think the EPA should investigate why Obama is always attracting flies, fecal material, rats and bees!


In a jolting reminder of just how far the American brand has fallen, the Islamic state of Iran began start-up of its first nuclear reactor, a gift from the rejuvenated “evil empire,” AKA Russia.

As reported at yahoo.news.com, in part:

“BUSHEHR, Iran – Trucks rumbled into Iran’s first reactor Saturday to begin loading tons of uranium fuel in a long-delayed startup touted by officials as both a symbol of the country’s peaceful intentions to produce nuclear energy as well as a triumph over Western pressure to rein in its nuclear ambitions.”

While the world is pushed to the brink of nuclear confrontation between Iran and Israel, America’s Marxist Muslim and part-time U.S. president is off to Martha’s Vineyard for his sixth—sixth!—-vacation of the year.

Critics are pouncing all over President Obama for his “fun in the sun” excesses, particularly now that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has nuclear power.

By the way,the notion that Iran is going nuclear only for “peaceful purposes” is so absurd that only a goofy, misguided, and naïve Muslim community organizer with a Marxist mind set would believe it.

Which brings us back to the world’s greatest obstacle to peace, that being Barack Hussein Obama.

Welcome to Martha Vineyards, sir?

To show their appreciation for Obama’s visit, the locals released the following good news:

“Portions of Tisbury Great Pond, the salt-water lagoon fronting the first family’s vacation estate Blue Heron Farm, were closed earlier this week due to high levels of enterococci, an indicator that the water is contaminated with fecal coliform bacteria.”

Fecal coliform bacteria?

Good heavens, the president would be better off in a gulf state, on an oil-blasted beach, than the icky stuff at Martha’s Vineyard!

Still, given his disastrous approval ratings and the poor prospects for Democrats in the upcoming election, perhaps fecal coliform bacteria is what Obama deserves?

Source…