Tag: Signs
Call Jesus
As I was driving home and worrying about all the stuff going on in my life, my family’s lives, my friends’ lives and what’s happening in Paris, Washington, Moscow, Ukraine, the Middle East, Socialism, Trump, ISIS, the downgrading of our military, 25,000 Syrian refugees, the terrorists and illegals infiltrating our borders, and how our country is rapidly losing its sanity and its Christianity, I saw a road sign that said:
“NEED HELP? CALL JESUS
1-800-005-3159”
Out of curiosity and desperation, I called the number.
A Mexican showed up with a lawnmower.
Funny Signs
At a tire shop in Michigan:
“Invite us to your next blowout.”
Door of a plastic surgeon’s office:
“Hello, can we pick your nose?”
At a Towing Company:
“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.”
Billboard on the side of the road:
“Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs.”
In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”
On a Butchers window:
“Let me meat your needs.”
On a desk in a reception room:
“We shoot every 3rd salesman, and the 2nd one just left.”
At the Electric Company:
“We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don’t you will be.”
Inside a Bowling Alley:
“Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop.”
In the front yard of a funeral home:
“Drive carefully, we’ll wait.”
In a counselors office:
“Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.”
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