Joke Of The Day

A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages “An’ whut animal would that be?” he asked the keeper.

“That’s a moose from Canada”, came the reply.

“A moose!!”, exclaimed the Scotsman. “Hoots, mon, if that’s a moose then they must ha’ rats the size of elephants over there!”

Joke Of The Day

A Cuban, a Scot, a Spaniard, and an Irishman are sharing a carriage on a train to Belfast.

The Cuban lights up this enormous Cuban cigar, takes one short drag from it and flings the cigar out the window.

The other three look at him in amazement and ask why he just threw out a full Cuban cigar.

He says, “I’m from Cuba, we have thousands of those things back home.”

The Scot pulls out a litre bottle of Bells Whiskey, a 50 year-old bottle, takes a short measure glass, half fills it, knocks it back and flings the remainder of the bottle out the window.

The other three are in shock, ask him why he just threw away a near full bottle of fine malt Scottish whiskey??!!

He replies, “I’m Scottish, we have thousands of those things at home.”

The Spaniard pulls out a flagon of red wine, a 100 year-old classic. He takes a couple of sips, licks his lips, and flings the remainder of the wine out the window.

The other three ask him why he just threw away a near full bottle of classic wine, he replies, “I’m Spanish, I have thousands of those things back home.”

The Irish then grabs the Spaniard and throws him out of the window.

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