Tag: Rednecks

Jokes

Joke Of The Day: Redneck Male Stripper

Rubber Chicken Cletus is passing by Billy Bob ‘s hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old John Deere tractor.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his
shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt.

Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, “What the world’re ya doing, Billy Bob ?”

“Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me,” says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob ..

“But me ‘n the wife been havin trouble lately in the bedroom d’partment, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor.”

 

 

Amusing Jokes Political

I Must Be A Redneck

I Must Be A Redneck

This is not the type of Redneck jokes we normally hear. This is a bit different.

We have enjoyed the redneck jokes for years. It’s time to take a reflective look at the core beliefs of a culture that values home, family, country and God. If I had to stand before a dozen terrorists who threaten my life, I’d choose a half-dozen or so rednecks to back me up. Tire irons, squirrel guns and grit — that’s what rednecks are made of. I hope I am one of those. If you feel the same, pass this on to your redneck friends. Y’all know who ya are…

You might be a redneck if:
It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, ‘One nation, under God.’

You might be a redneck if:
You’ve never protested about seeing The 10 Commandments posted in public places.

You might be a redneck if:
You still say ‘Christmas’ instead of ‘Winter Festival.’

You might be a redneck if:
You bow your head when someone prays.

You might be a redneck if:
You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem

You might be a redneck if:
You treat our armed forces Veterans with great respect, and always have.

You might be a redneck if:
You’ve never burned an American flag, nor intend to.

You might be a redneck if:
You know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

You might be a redneck if:
You respect your elders and raised your kids to do the same. Some of you are so old you don’t have elders to respect.

You might be a redneck if:
You’d give your last dollar to A friend.

God Bless the USA!

 

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