Joke Of The Day

Two guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge. The judge said, “You seem like nice young men, and I’d like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to give up drugs forever. I’ll see you back in court Monday.

Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, “How did you do over the weekend?”

“Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever.”

“17 people? That’s wonderful. What did you tell them?”

“I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this:

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and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs.”

“That’s admirable,” said the judge. “And you, how did you do?” (to the 2nd boy)

“Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever.”

“156 people! That’s amazing! How did you manage to do that!”

“Well, I used the same two circles. I pointed to the small circle and told them, “this is your asshole before prison.”

Prison vs Work

Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed up, this should make
things a little bit clearer.

@ PRISON
You spend most of your time in a 10X10 cell

@ WORK
You spend most of your time in a 6X6 cubicle

@ PRISON
You get three fully paid for meals a day

@ WORK
You get a break for one meal, and you have to pay for it

@ PRISON
For good behavior, you get time off

@ WORK
For good behavior, you get more work

@ PRISON
The guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you

@ WORK
You must carry a security card and open all the doors yourself

@ PRISON
You can watch TV and play games

@ WORK
You could get fired for watching TV and playing games

@ PRISON
You get your own toilet

@ WORK
You have to share the toilet with people who pee on the seat

@ PRISON
They allow your family and friends to visit

@ WORK
You aren’t even supposed to speak to your family

@ PRISON
All expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required on your part

@ WORK
You must pay all your expenses to go to work, and they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners

@ PRISON
You spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out

@ WORK
You spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars

@ PRISON
You must deal with sadistic wardens

@ WORK
They are called ‘managers’

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