He didn’t like the casserole
And he didn’t like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard…
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn’t make the coffee right
He didn’t like the stew,
I didn’t mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I smacked him upside his head —
Like his mother used to do.
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An couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the ship watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the man overboard. They searched for days and couldn’t find him. So the captain sent the woman back to shore with the promise that he would notify her as soon as they found something.
Three weeks went by and finally the woman got a fax from the ship. It read: “Ma’am, sorry to inform you, we found your husband dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled him up to the deck and attached to his back-end was an oyster and inside the oyster was a pearl worth $50,000… please advise.” The woman faxed back: “Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap.”
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