Tag: John F. Kennedy
Joke Of The Day: American History
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The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some American History.
Who said ‘Give me Liberty, or give me Death’?” She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Hodakio, a bright foreign exchange student from Japan, who had his hand up: “Patrick Henry, 1775,” he said. “Very good! — Who said, ‘Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth.’ Again, no response except from Little Hodakio: “Abraham Lincoln, 1863.” “Excellent!” said the teacher continuing, “Let’s try one a bit more difficult. Who said, ‘Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country’?” Once again, Hodakio’s was the only hand in the air and he said: “John F. Kennedy, 1961.” The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed of yourselves, Little Hodakio isn’t from this country and he knows more about our history than you do.” She heard a loud whisper: “F**k the Japs.” “Who said that? I want to know right now!? she angrily demanded. Little Hodakio put his hand up, “General MacArthur, 1945.” At that point, a student in the back said, “I’m gonna puke.’ The teacher glares around and asks, ‘All right! Now who said that?” Again, Little Hodakio says, “George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.” Now furious, another student yells, “Oh yeah? Suck this!” Little Hodakio jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, “Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!” Now with almost mob hysteria someone said, “You little shit! If you say anything else I’ll kill you!” Little Hodakio frantically yells at the top of his voice, “Michael Jackson to the children testifying against him, 2004.” The teacher fainted. As-the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, “Oh shit, we’re screwed!” Little Hodakio said quietly, “The American people, November 4, 2008.” |
Joke Of The Day: Classroom Motivation
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One Friday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off. She started with “This was England’s finest hour.” Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said, “Winston Churchill.” “Congratulations,” said the teacher, “you may go home early.” The teacher then said, “Ask not what your country can do for you, but..” Before she could finish the quote, another young lady belts out, “John F. Kennedy!” “Very good,” says the teacher, “you may go also.” Irritated that he has missed two golden opportunities, Little Johnny said, “I wish those girls would just shut up.” Upon overhearing this comment, the outraged teacher demanded to know who said it. Johnny instantly rose to his feet and said, “Bill Clinton. I’ll see you Monday.” |
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