Joke Of The Day

An Italian man wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little math test.

“Here’s your first question,” the foreman said. “Without using numbers, represent the number 9.”

“Without numbers?” the I talian says, “Dat is easy.” And he proceeds to draw three trees.

“What’s this?” the boss asks.

“Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,” says the Italian.

“Fair enough,” says the boss. “Here’s your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99.”

The Italian stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. “Ere you go.”

The boss scratches his head and says, “How on earth do you get that to represent 99?”

“Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it’s dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.”

The boss is getting worried that he’s going to actually have to hire this Italian, so he says, “All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.”

The Italian stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, “Ere you go. One hundred.”

The boss looks at the attempt. “You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!”

The Italian leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, “A little dog came along and crap by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, dat make one hundred. So, when I start?”

Joke Of The Day

An old Italian Mafia Don is dying.
He calls his grandson to his bedside. “
Guido, I wanna you lissina me. I wanna you
to take-a my chrome plated .38
revolver so you will always
remember me.”

“But grandpa, I really don’t like guns.
How about you leave me your Rolex watch
instead?”

“You lissina me, boy.
Somma day you gonna be runna DA
business, you gonna have a
beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and
maybe a couple of bambinos “

“Somma day you gonna come-a home and
maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man..
“Whatta you gonna do then?
Pointa to you watch and say, ‘Time’s Up’?

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