Joke Of The Day: The Piano Tuner

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May 212018
 
Joke Of The Day: The Piano Tuner Mrs. Smith needed to have her piano tuned so she asked a friend for a recommendation. She then made an appointment with the piano tuner, Mr. Opperknockity. He arrived two days later, tuned the piano satisfactorily, and left.

Shortly after that, Mrs. Smith noticed that the piano was terribly out of tune again. She called the tuner to complain about it and to ask for a return visit to solve the problem.

However, the tuner replied, “I’m sorry ma’am, but Opperknockity only tunes once!”

 

 

 

 

Good Natured Bible Jokes

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May 192018
 
Good Natured Bible JokesQ: What kind of man was Boaz before he married?
A: Ruth-less.

Q: What do they call pastors in Germany?
A: German Shepherds.

Q: Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A: Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q: What was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A: Pharaoh’s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.

Q: What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A: Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David’s Triumph was heard throughout the land. Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

Q: Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A: Samson. He brought the house down.

Q: What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A: Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q: Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A: Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q: Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A: The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.

Q: Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?
A: David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q: Which Bible character had no parents?
A: Joshua, son of Nun.

 

 

 

 

Joke Of The Day: Two Polish Guys On A Train

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May 192018
 
Joke Of The Day: Two Polish Guys On A Train Two Polish guys were taking their first train trip to Warsaw.

A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas which they’d never seen before. Each bought one.

The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel. When the train emerged from the tunnel, he looked across to his friend and said,

“I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.”

“Why not?”

“I took one bite and went blind for half a minute.”

 

 

 

 

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