Joke Of The Day: The Gorilla

Rubber ChickenThere was a man who owned a giant gorilla and he’d never left it on its own. But eventually he had to take a trip, so he left his gorilla in the care of his next-door neighbor. He explained to his neighbor that all he had to do was feed his gorilla three bananas a day at three, six, and nine o’clock. But he was never ever to touch its fur.

So the next day the man came and gave the gorilla a banana and looked at it for a while thinking, “Why can’t I touch its fur? Nothing seems to be wrong with it.”

Every day he came in and sized up the gorilla for a little while longer as he still couldn’t understand. About a week later, he’d worked himself into a frenzy and decided that he was going to touch the gorilla. He passed it the banana and very gently brushed the back of his hand against its fur.

Suddenly the gorilla went “ape” and started to violently jump around. Then it turned and began to running towards the man who, in turn, ran through the front door, over the lawn, across the street, into a sports car, and drove off.

In the rear-view mirror, he could see the gorilla in another sports car, driving right behind him and motioning for him to pull over. He drove for two hours until the engine began to splutter and the car just stopped. He jumped out and began to run down the street, over a brick wall, into someone’s front garden, and up an apple tree. He turned around to find the gorilla right behind him beating its chest.

The man jumped down and ran back into the street screaming, until it became dark and he thought he’d lost the gorilla. The man ran into an alleyway then, suddenly, he saw a giant shadow coming down the street ahead. It was the gorilla!

This time there was no escape. As the gorilla neared him, the man began to feel faint. The giant beast came face to face with him, slowly raised its mighty hand and said, “Tag! You’re it!”

 

 

Gorilla vs. Goose

Enjoy!

It seems like a lopsided match-up, goose versus gorilla, but things aren’t always as they appear.

In a video uploaded to YouTube, which has already been viewed more than 39,000 times, a goose and a gorilla go head-to-head — and it’s the gorilla that ends up retreating.

After a really good stare-down, the goose then takes off towards the gorilla, flapping its wings in an aggressive manner. At that, the ape backpedaled feverishly, not wanting to test the bird’s limits.

Source…

 

Product Of The Day: Gorilla Boogers

Stumped on what to give out for Halloween?

Gorilla Boogers

This is a little old but funny nonetheless.

Honestly, I’m not positive this really counts as candy, but it’s close and it’s weird. Gorilla no Hana Kuso (Gorilla Boogers) are evidently sweetened, shriveled, black beans that look a whole lot like raisins. They have been popular in Japan for a while, especially near zoos, and they have just recently made their way to the U.S. – they have been spotted in Manhattan recently.

Source…

Going Gorillas

Video Description:

A while ago the good people at Werribee Open Range Zoo let us try out their unfinished Gorilla enclosure… Well now it’s finished and from November 7 there will be some even realer Gorilla’s in there. Go and check ’em out! (They’re probably not as good at golf as us)”.

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