Tag: Crazy

Amusing Funny

Taking Selfies Is A Mental Disorder

Taking ‘Selfies’ Is A Mental Disorder

Don’t worry. It’s covered under ObamaCare!

The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has officially confirmed what many people thought all along: taking selfies is a mental disorder.

The APA made this classification during its annual board of directors meeting in Chicago. The disorder is called selfitis, and is defined as the obsessive compulsive desire to take photos of one’s self  and post them on social media as a way to make up for the lack of self-esteem and to fill a gap in intimacy.

APA said there are three levels of the disorder:

  • Borderline selfitis : taking photos of one’s self at least three times a day but not posting them on social media
  • Acute selfitis: taking photos of one’s self at least three times a day and posting each of the photos on social media
  • Chronic selfitis: Uncontrollable urge to take photos of one’s self  round the clock and posting the photos on social media more than six times a day

According to the APA, while there is currently no cure for the disorder, temporary treatment is available through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).  The other good news is that CBT is covered under Obamacare.

Read more…

 

Funny Jokes

The Things That Drive A Sane Person Mad

* You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them.

* The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle.

* The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.

* There’s always a car riding your tail when you’re slowing down to find an address.

* You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.

* There’s a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.

* You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

* Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you’re trying to get a reading.

* A station comes in brilliantly when you’re standing near the radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.

* There are always one or two ice cubes that won’t pop out of the tray.

* You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.

* The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.

* A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling (or braces).

* You set the alarm on your digital clock for 6 pm instead of 6 am.

* The radio station doesn’t tell you who sang that song.

* You rub on hand cream and can’t turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

* People behind you on a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up.

* Your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire.

* You can’t look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don’t know how to spell it.

* You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you’re just browsing.

* You had that pen in your hand only a second ago and now you can’t find it.

* You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.

 

Jokes

Joke Of The Day: Crazy Uncle Louie

Rubber ChickenA woman gives birth to twins, a girl and a boy.

Her husband isn’t there, and she doesn’t want to name them without him seeing them first. But the hospital insists that the babies must be named by the end of the day.

Crazy Uncle Louie overhears this and he names them (unbeknownst to the couple).

Later the husband arrives, and the happy couple are set to name the babies when a nurse informs them that Uncle Louie already took care of that.

“Oh no!” they cry. “He’s crazy and doesn’t know what he’s doing. What names did he pick?”

The nurse says, “Well, he named the girl Denise.”

“Whew, not bad. In fact, that’s nice.

And how about the boy?”

“Denephew.”

 

 

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