Tag: Computers

Jokes

ID Ten T Error

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Jimmy, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Jimmy clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong?

He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’

I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, ‘An, ID ten T error? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.’

Jimmy grinned…. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?’

‘No,’ I replied.

‘Write it down,’ he said, ‘and I think you’ll figure it out.’

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

Amusing

Life Before Computers

Before Computers:

An application was for employment.

A program was a TV show.

A cursor used profanity.

A keyboard was a piano!

Memory was something that you lost with age.

A CD was a bank account.

And if you had a 3 1/2 inch floppy You hoped nobody found out!

Compress was something you did to garbage not something you did to a file.

If you unzipped anything in public You’d be in jail for awhile!

Log on was adding wood to a fire.

Hard drive was a long trip on the road.

A mouse pad was where a mouse lived.

A backup happened to your toilet!

Cut you did with a pocket knife and Paste you did with glue.

A web was a spider’s home.

And a virus was the flue!

Amusing

New Computer Symbols

We all know those cute little computer symbols called “Emoticons” where:

; ) means a smile and
; ( is a frown.

Sometimes these are represented by

;- )
;- (

Well, how about some “Ass – Emoticons”?

(_!_) a regular Ass

(__!__) a fat Ass

(!) a tight Ass

(_*_) a sore Ass

{_!_} a swishy Ass

(_o_) an Ass that’s been around

(_x_) kiss my Ass

(_X_) leave my Ass alone

(_zzz_) a tired Ass

(_E=mc2_) a smart Ass

(_$_) Money coming out of his Ass

(_?_) Dumb Ass

Amusing

OS Xbox Pro

This is a fascinating video showing an Xbox being turned into a multi-operating system computer.

Being the geek that I am… I was memorized watching it!

Amusing

Computer Terms – Texas Translation

LOG ON: Making a wood stove hotter.

LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood.

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the wood stove.

DOWNLOAD: Gettin’ the farwood off the truck

MEGA HERTZ: When yer not keerful gettin’ the farwood

FLOPPY DISC: Whatcha git from tryin to carry too much farwood

RAM: That thing tha splits the farwood

HARD DRIVE: Gettin’ home in the winter time

PROMPT: What the mail ain’t in the winter time

WINDOWS: What to shut when it’s cold outside

SCREEN: What to shut when it’s black fly season

BYTE: What them dang flies do

CHIP: Munchies fer the TV

MICRO CHIP: What’s in the bottom of the munchie bag

MODEM: Whatcha did to the hay fields

DOT MATRIX: Old Dan Matrix’s wife

LAP TOP: Where the kitty sleeps

KEYBOARD: Where ya hang the dang truck keys

SOFTWARE: Them dang plastic forks and knives

MOUSE: What eats the grain in the barn

MOUSE PAD: That’s hippie talk fer the mouse hole

MAIN FRAME: Holds up the barn roof

ENTER: Northerner talk fer “c’mon in, y’all”

RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: When ya can’t ‘member what ya paid fer the rifle

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