Joke Of The Day: Texting

Rubber ChickenA middle-aged couple had finally learned how to send and receive texts on their cell phones.

The wife, being a romantic at heart, decided one day that she’d send her husband a text while she was out of the house having coffee with a friend.

She texted:

If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I love you.

The husband, being a no-nonsense sort of guy, texted back:
I’m on the toilet. Please advise.

 

 

Church Services Of The Future

Pastor: “Praise the Lord!”

Congregation: “Hallelujah!”

Pastor: “Will everyone please turn on their tablet, PC, iPad, smart phone, and Kindle Bibles to 1 Cor 13:13. And please switch on your Bluetooth to download the sermon.”

P-a-u-s-e……

“Now, Let us pray committing this week into God’s hands. Open your Apps, BBM, Twitter and Facebook, and chat with God”

S-i-l-e-n-c-e

“As we take our Sunday tithes and offerings, please have your credit and debit cards ready. You can log on to the church wi-fi using the password ‘Lord909887. The ushers will circulate mobile card swipe machines among the worshipers:

Those who prefer to make electronic fund transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the church. Those who prefer to use iPads can open them. Those who prefer telephone banking, take out your cellphones to transfer your contributions to the church account.

The holy atmosphere of the Church becomes truly electrified as ALL the smart phones, iPads, PCs and laptops beep and flicker!

Final Blessing and Closing Announcements…

  • This week’s ministry cell meetings will be held on the various Facebook group pages where the usual group chatting takes place. Please log in and don’t miss out.
  • Thursday’s Bible study will be held live on Skype at 1900hrs GMT. Please don’t miss out.
  • You can follow your Pastor on Twitter this weekend for counseling and prayers.

God bless you and have nice day.

 

Smartphone Addiction

“I Forgot My Phone” is an excellent short film about smartphone addiction. The film was directed by Miles Crawford and stars Charlene deGuzman who also wrote the script.

It’s so sad but so true.

Quintuple threat (actress/comedian/musician/tap dancer/awesome person) Charlene deGuzman stars in I Forgot My Phone — a short film she wrote about life in these modern, soul-sucking, smartphone-saturated times.

Like this if you watched it on your phone.

Source…

 

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