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A man goes to see a fortune teller. The teller was renowned for their abilities, but even more so for their strange curios. The man walks into the fortune teller’s shop, and immediately sees the teller, and a man curled up on the floor in a pool of his own blood.
“What’s with him?” “Him? Oh, that’s just Bob. Don’t worry about him!” the fortune teller assured him, “You’ve come to see your future, yes?” “Well, yes, but-” “Good, but first, sit with me a minute. I want you to see this!” The man sits in the chair, anxious at whatever’s about to come. The fortune teller whips out a white oak box with a hole the width of a small tangerine in it. As he sets it down, he explains, “This box is special, you see, inside is a wonder never known to man. If you stick your finger in it, it’ll jab you, and then out’ll pop a slip of paper telling you the worst pain you’ll experience in your life.” “Wow… but what happened to Bob?” “Don’t worry about him, look! A customer! Watch this, and then you’ll go.” Another man walks through the fortune teller’s door, and the teller gives him the same speech, this time urging the man to stick his finger in. He does, winces, and pulls out his finger, with a note tied neatly to it with twine. He reads the note, and immediately throws his car keys across the room and sprints away. “Must have been a car accident in his future. Another customer is coming, stay and watch one more with me. And then you’ll go!” A young couple walks in, the teller gives them both the same speech, and the man goes first. He sticks his finger in, winces, and pulls out his note. He shows it to his wife with a pale face. She goes, and as they both read her note, he goes sprinting out, with her right after him. “Poor gal, I’ll bet he was cheating. Why don’t you go now, there’s nobody coming for a while.” And the man puts his finger right up to the hole, but just before he puts his finger in, he pauses for a moment. “Wait, but… what happened to Bob?” “Oh, don’t worry about him. He’s how we figured out it only likes fingers!”
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