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A fragile looking old man approaches a young woman at a grocery store.
He says, “Excuse me. I know this is going to sound awkward, but I was wondering if I could pay you to have sex with me.” She slaps him in the face and says, “I’m married. How dare you?” He replies, “I didn’t mean to offend you. Maybe you could ask him if he would be OK with it.” She slaps him in the face again and says, “I told you I am married. Are you ignorant or just stupid?” He says, “Look, I’m clean, but I’ll wear protection if that’s what you’re worried about. I just want to see that I can still perform, if you know what I mean. I will give you $200, no strings attached.” She says, “Fine, I will ask him. But if he says no, leave me alone.” He agrees. She steps away, phone in hand, then comes back a couple of minutes later and tells him, “My husband said OK, but you are just going to set the money in front of me and as soon as I pick it up, you are done. He’s expecting me to call back in less than five minutes.” Again, the man agrees. Five minutes go by, then ten, then twenty. Finally, a half hour later, the husband calls. “What is going on?” he yells. Struggling to breathe, she screams, “HE…PAID…WITH…QUARTERS!”
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