| Q: How did the tuba player kill himself? A: He walked off a clef. Q: How do musicians pay their debts?A: With quarter notes. Q: Why did the percussionist leave? Q: Why did the opera house fire their male singer? Q: Why aren’t fish allowed to play in an orchestra? Q: Why did the conductor tell the trumpeter to stop talking? Q: What do you call a conductor who is always giving his orchestra grief? Q: What does a musician use to sign his checks? Q: Why was the clarinetist always cutting himself?
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| Coffee can go in, but tea cannot. Riddles can go in, but question cannot. Quizzes can go in, but survey cannot. Spoon can go in, but fork cannot. Green can go in, but red cannot. Glass can go in, but plastic cannot. Door can go in, but window cannot.
Why? |
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A cub reporter for a small town newspaper was sent out on his first assignment one day. He submitted the following report to his editor.
“Mrs. Smith was injured in a one-car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with lacerations on her breasts.” The Editor scolded the new reporter, saying. “This is a family paper. We don’t use words like breasts around here. Now go back and write something more appropriate!” The young reporter thought long and hard. Finally he handed the Editor the following report. “Mrs. Smith was injured in a one-car accident today. She is recovering in County Hospital with lacerations on her ( . )( . )”
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| There are three brothers: Al, Ben, and Carl. Two of the three brothers are boxers. Here are some facts:
1. The shorter of Al and Ben is the older boxer. Which brother is not a boxer? |
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