Joke Of The Day: An Ideal Husband

Rubber Chicken A woman puts an ad in the paper for a husband. In her ad she includes the three things that she’s looking for in a husband:

She wants a man who won’t beat her.
She wants a man that won’t leave her.
She wants a really great lover.

A few days later the doorbell rings. The woman opens the door to find a man with no arms or legs sitting in a wheelchair on her porch. She says, “How may I help you?”

He replies that he is there to answer her ad in the paper.

She says, “Oh, but I am looking for a man that won’t beat me.”

He replies, “I have no arms. How can I beat you?”

She says, “Ok, but I want someone who won’t leave me.”

And he replies, “I have no legs and if you take away my wheelchair I can’t even move. How could I leave you?”

She nods her head and says, “Well, what I really want is a great lover.”

The man looks at her and says, “Lady, how do you think I rang the doorbell?!”