Joke Of The Day: Pour Another One For My Friend

 Jokes  Comments Off on Joke Of The Day: Pour Another One For My Friend
Dec 262013
 
Rubber Chicken There was a mine in a small town that had completely collapsed. One of the engineers who miraculously survived the disaster went into the local watering hole. The bar was empty except for one lonely soul at the other end of the bar.

“Hey bartender” said the Engineer, “I’ll have a beer and pour another one for my friend down at the end there.”

The bartender responded, “I’m sorry sir but that guy’s a Chinaman and we don’t serve his kind around here.”

“Well, you’d better because if it weren’t for that guy, I wouldn’t be here. You remember that mine that caved in, well I was in that mine and so was that guy. When the last of us were escaping, he held the roof of the mine up with his head! So get him a beer and if you don’t believe me, look at the top of his head and you’ll see that it’s flat from holding the roof up.”

The bartender skeptically served the Chinaman his beer and then came back to talk to the Engineer:

“I saw the flat spot on his head but I also couldn’t help noticing all the bruising under his chin. What’s that all about?”

The engineer responded: “Oh… that’s where we put the jack.”

 

 

Random Riddle: 12-25-2013

 Riddles  Comments Off on Random Riddle: 12-25-2013
Dec 252013
 
Q: If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Mistletoe!

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Q: What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
A: Sandy Claus!

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.

Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!

Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!

Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.

Q: What do you do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.

Q: How come you never hear anything about the 10th reindeer, “Olive”?
A: Yeah, you know, “Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names…”

Q: What was so good about the neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.
 

Riddle