Joke Of The Day

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Sep 162009
 

Back in the 1800s there was a wooden sailing ship. One day, the guy in the crow’s nest says, “Captain! There’s an enemy ship ahead!”

The captain says, “Bring me my red shirt.”

So the captain’s assistant runs off, grabs his red shirt and brings it back to the captain. He puts it on, and battle begins. The cannons roar, the crew swings over on the boarding lines, and they start fighting hand to hand.

The battle is over in minutes, and not a single sailor is lost. About 15 minutes later, the assistant pops up to the captain and asks him why he wanted a red shirt.
The captain says, “If I had been shot, and was bleeding, the crew would not notice the blood, and continue to fight.” The assistant nods and makes a mental note to remember that someday.

The next day, the guy up in the crow’s nest screams, “Captain! Twenty enemy ships approaching fast!” The captain says, “Bring me my brown pants!”

A Letter From Bush to Obama

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Sep 162009
 

After the president has been in office for 6 months it is customary for the last president to send a note of congratulations to the new one. So yesterday when the note came from Bush to Obama, the President was somewhat troubled because it was written in code and all it said was:

370H-SSV-0773H

This troubled him as he had always heard from his peers how former president Bush was perceived to have been scholarly challenged. So he called in the VP who was also unable to decode the message.

They called in the chief of staff and the head of Secret Service detail and they were unable to determine the meaning of the note. Next he called in the head of the Senate and Speaker of the House. They both were mystified by the meaning of the coded message.

Now there was complete panic in the oval office.

A special emergency meeting was called by the staff. All branches of the military, counter intelligence, CIA, FBI were called in, and the best minds were unable crack the code. After a sleepless night, a now humbled President picked up the phone and called the former president, and asked him the meaning of the note.

Bush chuckled and replied: Dude, you’re holding it upside down!

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