Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day. As they walked, they come across a sign: “Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”
“I am entering!” said Snow White. After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how’d ya do?”
“First Place!” said Snow White.
They continue walking and they see a sign: “Contest for the strongest man in the world.”
“I’m entering,” says Superman. After half an hour, he returns and they ask him, “How did you make out?”
“First Place,” answers Superman. “Did you ever doubt?”
They continue walking when they see a sign: “Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?” Pinocchio enters.
After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes.
“What happened?” they asked.
“Who the hell is this Nancy Pelosi?” asked Pinocchio.
AmusingComments Off on A Letter From Dodge Dealer George C. Joseph
May212009
This letter was written by a Dodge Isuzu dealer in Melbourne Florida. It highlights the fact that the Nationalization of America is no longer an idle rumor. The raping and pillaging of America and our Constitution is taking place with breakneck speed right before our very eyes. And now, for the million-dollar question… What are we going to do about it?
Read it and spread the word.
Letter from a Dodge dealer
letter to the editor
My name is George C. Joseph. I am the sole owner of Sunshine Dodge-Isuzu, a family owned and operated business in Melbourne, Florida. My family bought and paid for this automobile franchise 35 years ago in 1974. I am the second generation to manage this business.
We currently employ 50+ people and before the economic slowdown we employed over 70 local people. We are active in the community and the local chamber of commerce. We deal with several dozen local vendors on a day to day basis and many more during a month. All depend on our business for part of their livelihood. We are financially strong with great respect in the market place and community. We have strong local presence and stability.
I work every day the store is open, nine to ten hours a day. I know most of our customers and all our employees. Sunshine Dodge is my life.
On Thursday, May 14, 2009 I was notified that my Dodge franchise, that we purchased, will be taken away from my family on June 9, 2009 without compensation and given to another dealer at no cost to them. My new vehicle inventory consists of 125 vehicles with a financed balance of 3 million dollars. This inventory becomes impossible to sell with no factory incentives beyond June 9, 2009. Without the Dodge franchise we can no longer sell a new Dodge as “new,” nor will we be able to do any warranty service work. Additionally, my Dodge parts inventory, (approximately $300,000.) is virtually worthless without the ability to perform warranty service. There is no offer from Chrysler to buy back the vehicles or parts inventory.
Our facility was recently totally renovated at Chrysler’s insistence, incurring a multi-million dollar debt in the form of a mortgage at Sun Trust Bank.
HOW IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA CAN THIS HAPPEN?
THIS IS A PRIVATE BUSINESS NOT A GOVERNMENT ENTITY
This is beyond imagination! My business is being stolen from me through NO FAULT OF OUR OWN. We did NOTHING wrong.
This atrocity will most likely force my family into bankruptcy. This will also cause our 50+ employees to be unemployed. How will they provide for their families? This is a total economic disaster.
HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN IN A FREE MARKET ECONOMY IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA?
I beseech your help, and look forward to your reply. Thank you.
Sincerely,
George C. Joseph President & Owner Sunshine Dodge-Isuzu
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has cheated him out of ten million bucks. His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that a deaf bookkeeper would not hear anything that he might have to testify about in court.
When the Godfather goes to confront the bookkeeper about his missing $10 million, he brings along his attorney, who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, “Ask him where the 10 million bucks he embezzled from me is.” The attorney, using sign language, asks the bookkeeper where the money is. The bookkeeper signs back: “I don’t know what you are talking about.”
The attorney tells the Godfather: “He says he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.” The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to the bookkeeper’s temple and says, “Ask him again!” The attorney signs to the bookkeeper “He’ll kill you if you don’t tell him!”
The bookkeeper signs back: “OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo’s backyard in Queens !” The Godfather asks the attorney: “Well, what’d he say?” The attorney replies: “He says you don’t have the balls to pull the trigger.”
That fateful day finally arrived: Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is met by St. Peter himself at the Pearly Gates.
“Well, Forrest, it’s certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you,” St. Peter says. “I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up fast, and we’ve been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven.”
“It shor is good to be here, St. Peter, sir,” says Forest. “But nobody ever tolt me about any entrance exam. Shor hope the test ain’t too hard; life was a big enough test as it was.”
“Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions. First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T? Second: How many seconds are there in a year? Third: What is God’s first name?”
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up and says, “Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers.”
Forrest says, “Well, the first one — which two days in the week begin with The letter ‘T’? Shucks, that one’s easy. That’d be Today and Tomorrow.”
The Saint’s eyes open wide and he exclaims, “Forrest, that’s not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I didn’t specify, so I’ll give you credit for that answer. How about the next one? How many seconds in a year?”
“Now that one’s harder,” says Forrest, “but I thunk and thunk about that and I guess the only answer can be twelve.”
Astounded, St. Peter says, “Twelve? Twelve!? Forrest, how in Heaven’s name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?”
Forrest says “Shucks, there’s gotta be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd—“
“Hold it,” interrupts St. Peter. “I see where you’re going with this, and I see your point. Though that wasn’t quite what I had in mind, I’ll have to give you credit for that one, too. Let’s go on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God’s first name”?
“Sure”, Forrest says smiling, “it’s Howard.”
“Howard?!” exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St. Peter. “OK, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Howard as the first name of God?”
“Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,” Forrest replies. “Don’t you know the Lord’s own prayer? ‘Our father who art in heaven, Howard be thy name…’.”
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates and said: “Run Forrest, run.”
Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day. As they walked, they come across a sign: “Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”
