Tag: Sarah Palin

Amusing

Breaking Scandal: Sarah Palin Hunts Sasquatch Out of Season


If its in “The Weekly World News” it must be true. Actually this is probably the most factually accurate “Main Stream Media” article on Sarah Palin to date!

Palin Bags a Bigfoot

Records and eyewitnesses have come to light that prior to announcing her candidacy for the Vice Presidency; Sarah Palin shot a Bigfoot from a helicopter.

A government helicopter was seen flying low over the Chugach National Park with what witnesses described as “a sexy librarian shooting out the side.” Employees at a local bait shop report seeing a similar woman only hours before carrying an infant in a camouflage Baby Bjorn.

The Bigfoot, or Sasquatch as it is known in scientific circles, was found dead on the outskirts of the park, just south of Wasilla, Alaska. Preliminary forensics reports confirm that an adult male Sasquatch was shot in the face with Palin’s trademark 5mm M4 Carbine Assault Rifle.

Environmental groups are in an uproar at the hunting death of a rare and notoriously reclusive species. Efforts to have the Sasquatch placed on the endangered species list have met with repeated opposition from state legislature, since protecting the ‘Missing Link’ could be seen as validating evolution.

Conservatives have immediately rallied to their party’s new star, citing that gun ownership and hunting are indelible parts of American culture. Indeed this point is hard to argue, as John Adams was notorious for having captured what he called a “Skunk Ape” and killing it with his bare hands on the White House lawn in front of a paying audience.

Amusing

Bitter Clingers Tie it up in Pennsylvania: Obama 47% McCain 47%

Tied in Pennsylvania tied, tied in Minnesota, McCain up by 1 in Michigan. It doesn’t look good for “The One”.

Another good thing about this; I don’t think Fast Eddie Rendell likes Obama. He is a die hard Clintonite. I doubt if he will have the dead rise to vote for Obama.

All Tied in Pennsylvania: Obama 47% McCain 47%

The race for Pennsylvania’s 21 Electoral College votes is tied.

The latest Fox News/Rasmussen Reports telephone survey in the state finds Barack Obama and John McCain each attracting 47% of the vote (demographic crosstabs available for Premium Members). Eighty-three percent (83%) of Obama voters are certain they will vote for him and not change their mind before Election Day. An identical percentage of McCain voters say the same thing.

A week ago, Obama was up by two points after holding five percentage-point leads in August and July.

The latest poll finds the Republican candidate is viewed more a bit more favorably among voters than his opponent. McCain is viewed favorably by 60%, up three points from a week ago. Obama’s ratings are at 52% favorable, down three points.

Also, by a 51% to 42% margin, voters in the Keystone State trust McCain more than Obama.

Forty-three percent (43%) of Pennsylvania voters would be very or extremely comfortable with McCain as President. Forty-one percent (41%) say the same about Obama.

As for the running mates, 44% would be that comfortable if Biden had to assume the duties of President while 40% say the same about Palin in the Oval Office. Nationally, 63% say that McCain is prepared to be President while 44% say the same about Obama.

Rasmussen Reports and Fox News Channel will jointly release a series battleground state polls every Monday night at 6:00 p.m. Eastern. Other polls tonight were released for Colorado, Ohio, Florida, and Virginia. See overview of all polling released this week.

Rasmussen Reports will release other state polling on the Presidential race weeknights at 5:00 p.m. Eastern. The Rasmussen Reports daily Presidential Tracking Poll, follows the race on a national basis and is updated every morning at 9:30 a.m. Eastern. (Sign up for a free daily e-mail update).

Rasmussen Markets data shows that Democrats are currently given a 68.0 % chance of winning Pennsylvania’s 21 Electoral College Votes this fall.

John Kerry won the state for the Democrats in 2004 by a 51% to 48% margin over President Bush. Four years earlier, Al Gore carried the state by four percentage points. Immediately prior to release of this poll, Pennsylvania was rated as “Leans Democrat” in the Rasmussen Reports Balance of Power Calculator. NOTE: Factors other than the latest Rasmussen Reports poll impact the Balance of Power ratings. The current status is indicated on the table in the upper righthand corner of this article.

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