The University Of Life

The University Of Life

John Kallam graduated with a BA in criminology and entered the US Army. He served for 20 years beginning in the late 1930s. He was an investigator during the Nuremberg trials of Nazi war criminals, and stayed in Germany for many years, organizing civilian police forces in the post-war era. He also wrote numerous books on criminal justice. He retired from military service in the late 1950s at the rank of full colonel.

Returning to Fresno, California, he began teaching criminology at what was then Fresno State College (later to become the California State University, Fresno). His work was well respected, but after about ten years of service, he was called to see the president of the college. He was informed that he could no longer teach with just a bachelor’s degree. Times were changing, he was told, and the school demanded that faculty members hold a graduate degree. Merely having 20 years of distinguished experience was no longer considered sufficient qualification to teach. All new faculty were being required to hold a doctorate, it was explained, and the school was actually doing him a favor by letting him keep his job by getting ‘only’ a master’s degree. So John enrolled in a summer program at an out-of-state college. Three months of intensive seminars and then nine months of home study would get him his MA.

On the first day of class, the instructor was taking roll. He stopped when he read John’s name.

“Are you related to the John Kallam who wrote the textbook we’ll be using?” he asked.

“I am the John Kallam who wrote the textbook you’re using,” came the dry response.

 

Texas Beer Joint Sues Local Church

TEXAS BEER JOINT SUES LOCAL CHURCH OVER LIGHTNING STRIKE!

(This should keep you chuckling for awhile)

A bar called Drummond’s (in Mt Vernon, Texas ) began construction on an expansion of their building, hoping to “grow” their business.

In response, the local Southern Baptist Church started a campaign to block the bar from expanding – petitions, prayers, etc.

About a week before the bar’s grand re-opening, a bolt of lightning struck the bar and burned it to the ground!

Afterward, the church folks were rather smug – bragging about “the power of prayer”.

The angry bar owner eventually sued the church on grounds that the church… “Was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, through direct actions or indirect means.”

Of course, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building’s demise.

The judge read carefully through the plaintiff’s complaint and the defendant’s reply.

He then opened the hearing by saying:

“I don’t know how I’m going to decide this, but it appears from the paperwork that what we have here is a bar owner who now believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that does not.”

 

How Gullible are We?

A freshman at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. In his project, he urged people to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical “dihydrogen monoxide.”

And for plenty of good reasons, since:

1. It can cause excessive sweating and vomiting
2. It is a major component in acid rain
3. It can cause severe burns in its gaseous state
4. Accidental inhalation can kill you
5. It contributes to erosion
6. It decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
7. It has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients

He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical. Forty-three said yes, six were undecided, and only one knew that the chemical was water. The title of his prize winning project was, “How Gullible Are We?” He feels the conclusion is obvious.

Einstein Flunked Math: The Story and The Truth

The story we heard:

Motivational speakers love to tell this tale, inspiring underachievers with the story of this German kid who was just like you! Despite his sincerest efforts he could never manage to do well in his math exams, and struggled desperately with physics while working as a lowly patent clerk.

The truth:

Well, no you can’t. As it turns out, Einstein was a mathematical prodigy, and before he was 12, he was already better at arithmetic and calculus than you are now. Einstein was in fact so smart that he believed school was holding him back, and his parents purchased advanced textbooks for him to study from. Not only did he pass math with flying colors, it’s entirely possible that he was actually teaching the class by the end of semester.

The idea that Einstein did badly at school is thought to have originated with a a 1935 Ripley’s Believe it or Not! trivia column.


Not!

There’s actually a good reason why it’s a bad idea to include Robert Ripley among the references in your advanced university thesis. The famous bizarre trivia “expert” never cited his sources, and the various “facts” he presented throughout his career were an amalgamation of things he thought he read somewhere or heard from somebody. The feature’s title probably should have been: Believe it or Not! I Get Paid Either Way.

When he was first shown this supposed expose of his early life, Einstein allegedly just laughed, and probably went on to solve another 12 mysteries of quantum physics before dinner. By the time he finally kicked the bucket in 1955, it’s entirely possible that “failure” was the one concept that Albert Einstein had never managed to master.

Of course, this just reaffirms what we have always suspected, deep down: success really is decided at birth, and your life will never be better than it is right now. Sorry about that.

Source…

Never Drive In The Rain With Your Cruise Control On

I received this information in an email so I decided to verify it with Snopes like I always do. What do you know? It turns out to be true!


Driving in the rain

I wonder how many people know about this ~ 

A 36 year old female had an accident several weeks ago and totaled her car.  A resident of Kilgore , Texas she was traveling between Gladewater & Kilgore.  It was raining, though not excessively, when her car suddenly began to hydro-plane and literally flew through the air.  She was not seriously injured but very stunned at the sudden occurrence!

When she explained to the highway patrolman what had happened he told her something that every driver should know – NEVER DRIVE IN THE RAIN WITH YOUR CRUISE CONTROL ON .  She thought she was being cautious by setting the cruise control and maintaining a safe consistent speed in the rain.

But the highway patrolman told her that if the cruise control is on when your car begins to hydro-plane and your tires lose contact with the pavement, your car will accelerate to a higher rate of speed making you take off like an airplane. She told the patrolman that was exactly what had occurred.  

The patrolman said this warning should be listed, on the driver’s seat sun-visor – NEVER USE THE CRUISE CONTROL WHEN THE PAVEMENT IS WET OR ICY, along with the airbag warning.  We tell our teenagers to set the cruise control and drive a safe speed – but we don’t tell them to use the cruise control only when the pavement is dry.

The only person the accident victim found, who knew this (besides the patrolman), was a man who had had a similar accident, totaled his car and sustained severe injuries.

NOTE: Some vehicles (like the Toyota Sienna Limited XLE) will not allow you to set the cruise control when the windshield wipers are on.

If you send this link to 15 people and only one of them doesn’t know about this, then it was all worth it.  You might have saved a life.


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