Tag: Snowman

The story of the snowman:

It had been snowing all night. So at…

8:00: I made a snowman.

8:10: A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.

8:15: So, I made a snow woman.

8:17: My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20: The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead.

8:22: The transgender person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25: The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28: I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31: The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burqa.

8:40: The Police arrive saying someone has been offended.

8:42: The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43: The council equalities officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45: TV news crew from CNN shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, “Snowballs” and am called a sexist.

9:00: I’m on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10: I am asked if I have any accomplices… my children are taken by social services.

9:29: Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

Moral: There is no moral to this story.  It’s just the world in which we live today and it’s going to get worse.