January 2011 - Page 31 of 43 - Common Sense Evaluation

AMBITIOUS : Always ready for a fart

AMIABLE : Likes to smell others’ farts

ANTI-SOCIAL : Excuses himself and farts in private

AQUATIC : Farts in bath, then breaks bubbles with toes

ATHLETIC : Jumps in the air, farts 3 times, and kicks his heels 3 times

BEWILDERED : Can’t tell his own fart from others

BIG BULLY : Farts louder than others

CARELESS : Farts in church

CHILDISH : Farts and then giggles

CLEVER : Farts and coughs at the same time

CONCEITED : Thinks he can fart the loudest

CONFUSED : Face is so much like an ass, fart can’t tell which way to go

CUTE : Smells your farts and then tells you what you were eating

DAMNED MEAN : Farts and then pulls the covers over his wife’s head

DISHONEST : Farts and then blames the dog

DISAPPOINTED : Fart doesn’t smell

DUMB : Enjoys other farts, thinks they are his own

ENVIRONMENTALIST : Farts regularly but is concerned about the pollution

FOOLISH : Suppresses a fart for hours

FRESH GUY : Jumps in front of you and then farts

GROUCH : Grumbles when ladies fart

HONEST : Admits he farted but offers a good medical reason

IMPUDENT : Farts out aloud and then laughs

LAZY : Just fizzles

MASOCHIST : Farts in the bath tub and tries to bite the bubbles

MISERABLE : Can’t fart at all

MUSICAL : Tenor or Bass, Clear as a bell, smells like shit and sounds like hell

NERVOUS : Stops in the middle of a fart

PROUD : Thinks his farts are exceptionally pleasant

SADIST : Farts in bed, then fluffs the covers

SCIENTIFIC : Bottles his farts

SENSITIVE : Farts and then starts crying

SHY : Blushes when he farts silently

SLOB : Farts and stains his underwear

SMART ALEC : Farts when ladies are present

SNEAKY : Farts and blames it on the dog

STINGY : Belches to save his ass-hole

STRATEGIC : Conceals his fart by loud laughter

THRIFTY : One who always has farts in reserve

TIMID : Jumps when he farts

UNFORTUNATE : Tries to fart but shits himself

VAIN PERSON : One who loves the smell of his own fart

WHIMPY : Farts at the slightest exertion

WISE GUY : Farts and asks who shit

This is a great story detailing the friendship between Tom Jones and Elvis.

It was not the only time that Tom had seen Elvis angry. Whenever John Lennon’s name came up, he would fly into a rage.

His dislike of the pacifist Beatle was born from the night I took the Fab Four to his house for their first — and last — meeting.

John had annoyed Presley by making his anti-war feelings known the moment he stepped into the massive lounge and spotted the table lamps — model wagons engraved with the message: ‘All the way with LBJ.’ Lennon hated President Lyndon B Johnson for raising the stakes in the Vietnam War.

Presley allied himself with the FBI director Edgar Hoover and encouraged him to have Lennon thrown out of the U.S.

‘He should’ve been kicked out long ago,’ Elvis told Tom that night. ‘I had a run-in with him myself,’ Tom said. He made some smart remark at a TV studios in England, where we were appearing on the show Thank Your Lucky Stars. I wanted to take him outside and see what sort of hiding his intellect would stand.’

For the first time that night, Elvis smiled. Tom was talking his kind of language.

Read more…

Common Sense Evaluation

Cartoon Of The Day

The Fart Chart

Tom Jones and Elvis BOTH Wanted to Beat up John Lennon

Japanese T-Shirt Folding Technique

Random Riddle