1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
5. You think ‘The Nutcracker’ is a vice on the work bench
6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don’t want it.
8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
12. Your grandmother has ‘ammo’ on her Christmas list.
13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower.
14. You’ve been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
15. You go to the stock car races and don’t need a program.
16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
18. Your house doesn’t have curtains, but your truck does.
19. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean?
20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say ‘Cool Whip’ on the
side.
24. The biggest city you’ve ever been to is WalMart.
25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV
26. You’ve used your ironing board as a buffet table.
27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of improvements.
28. You’ve used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury duty.
30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
Amusing
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Aug 032010
Picture Of The Day
Amusing
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Aug 032010
New Government Motors Commercial
Amusing
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Aug 022010
Not-So-Well-Known Medical Terminology
Amusing
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Aug 022010
Artery: Study of paintings
Bacteria: Back door of cafeteria
Barium: What doctors do when treatment fails
Cesarean section: District in Rome
Cat scan: Searching for kitty
Cauterize: Made eye contact with her
Coma: A punctuation mark
Congenital: Friendly
D&C: Where Washington is
Diarrhea: Journal of daily events
Dilate: To live long
Enema: Not a friend
Fester: Quicker
Fibula: A small lie
G.I. Series: Soldiers’ ball game
Outpatient: Person who has fainted
Pelvis: Cousin of Elvis
Post operative: Letter carrier
Protein: Favoring young people
Rectum: It almost killed him
Recovery room: Place to do upholstery
Terminal illness: Sickness at the airport
Tibia: Country in North Africa
Urine: Opposite of you’re out
Varicose: Located nearby
Vein: Conceited
Cartoon Of The Day
Cartoons
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Aug 022010

