Naming the Unknown: The Clarkson Legacy

Witness the transformative power of names and dreams in the Clarkson family's story. Join Quasar Hyperloop's quest to the stars and beyond.

In the quaint little suburb of Everdove, where the biggest scandal hitherto had been the Great Jellybean Shortage of ’08, Tom and Julia Clarkson had just welcomed their third marvel into the world. A bouncing baby who, for the initial weeks of its earthly existence, was simply referred to as “The Baby”. Not for lack of trying, mind you. Tom and Julia had spun the wheel of names more times than a heavyweight boxer’s head, but each suggestion felt like a mismatched sock.

It wasn’t until one fateful Sunday, under a sky so playful it decided to dabble in a bit of both sun and rain. They settled on a name so unusual, it could’ve been plucked from a hat filled with rejected superhero aliases. They decided to host a garden party to announce the name, which, in hindsight, was like lighting a firework in a library—startling and bound to draw attention.

As the family gathered, buzzing with the sort of anticipation usually reserved for unclaimed lottery tickets, Tom cleared his throat. The hush that settled was practically tangible. “We’ve named him ‘Quasar Hyperloop Clarkson’,” he announced, with the pride of a man who’s just solved a Rubik’s cube blindfolded.

The silence was deafening. It was as if the entire world had suddenly been vacuum-sealed. Mrs. Clarkson, senior, dropped her fork, sending it clattering against her plate in a desperate plea for normalcy.

“You can’t name your baby that!” Aunt Edna gasped, the statement erupting from her like soda from a shaken can.

Tom smiled, an oasis of calm in the bewildered desert. “But we already have.”

The air was thick with incredulity, seasoned lightly with a dusting of outrage. “Why on earth would you choose such a… such an unconventional name?” Tom’s brother, Mark, managed to sputter, his face a masterpiece of confusion.

“Ah,” Tom said, as if he had been waiting just for this moment. “Because, much like a quasar, our boy will be brilliant, unique, and immensely powerful. And the ‘Hyperloop’ part, well, that’s because we believe he will bring people closer, moving through life with incredible speed and efficiency.”

Julia nodded, her agreement silent but solid, a lighthouse guiding the way through tumultuous seas.

The explanation hung in the air, challenging decades of Johns and Janes, a velvet glove thrown down to tradition. Some family members exchanged skeptical looks, their expressions a parade of raised eyebrows and pursed lips. Others, however, began to thaw, intrigued by the novel idea that a name could be not only a label but a wish, a blessing for the future.

And so, as the afternoon waned, a discussion unfolded like a roadmap, exploring the significance of names, their impact on identity, and the ancient tradition of imbuing offspring with aspirational monikers. Ancient warriors were named for strength, scholars for wisdom. Was ‘Quasar Hyperloop’ really that different?

The debate swirled around the garden like leaves caught in a playful gust, touching on cultural precedents, on the power of individuality, and the bounds of parental ambition. Granny Clarkson, who’d been silent, a sphinx in her lawn chair, finally spoke up, her voice carrying the weight of experience like a well-weathered tome. “In my day, we named children after relatives, hoping they’d inherit their spirit. But times are a-changing. Maybe it’s not about looking back, but forward.”

This philosophical nugget, coming from the matriarch, seemed to turn the tide. One by one, relatives began to express not just acceptance, but excitement for the path this child, Quasar Hyperloop, might carve through the universe.

As dusk pulled its purple shawl tighter around the world, the garden party transformed. Names of stars and theoretical physics phenomena were bandied about with laughter, the family now competing to come up with the most outlandishly appropriate names for hypothetical future siblings. “Nebula Speedracer,” offered Cousin Pete, a suggestion that won him a playful nudge and a spilled drink.

In the end, the evening wasn’t just a name reveal; it became a testament to the power of open hearts and the endless potential of the human spirit. The Clarkson family, once a collection of traditionalists and skeptics, had ventured into uncharted territory, guided by the beacon that was little Quasar Hyperloop.

But life, as it is wont to do, moved on. Quasar grew, unfurling like a sail in the brisk wind of his parents’ love and ambition. His name, rather than being a stumbling block, became a piece of lore, the cornerstone of his personal legend. Far from being bullied, as Aunt Edna had fearfully predicted, Quasar became a symbol of innovation and curiosity in his school. Teachers smiled when they called on him, and classmates were eager to partner with someone so emblematically unique.

Tom and Julia watched, amazed, as their son defied gravity—metaphorically, of course. Their decision, once a spark of whimsy, was now a beam of light shooting across the tapestry of their lives, irrefutable proof that names could indeed shape destinies.

Years spiraled like leaves in an autumn dance, and Quasar Hyperloop Clarkson ventured into the world armed with a degree in astrophysics, his eyes set on the stars that had christened him. The kid with the outlandish name was now the man leading the charge into a new era of space exploration; his name no longer a question but a statement, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

One evening, under the velvet dome of a night sky embroidered with celestial wonders, Tom and Julia received a call. It was Quasar, his voice crackling with excitement across the static of distance and emotion. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been selected to join the first manned mission to Mars. I’ll be piloting the Hyperloop II spacecraft.”

The news, so fantastical and yet so real, swirled around them—a galaxy of pride, joy, and an inkling of parental anxiety. But above all, it was affirmation, a cosmic nod to the road less traveled, to the bravery of naming a child after dreams and distant lights.

As they prepared for the farewell, amid the buzz of media and the groundswell of global excitement, a surprise announcement was made. The Mars base, upon successful establishment, would be named “Quasar Station” in honor of not just the man but also the idea he represented: that reaching for the impossible, guided by a beacon of hope and individuality, can indeed transform dreams into reality.

The Clarkson family stood, hand in hand, eyes moist and hearts ablaze with pride, as Quasar Hyperloop Clarkson boarded the spacecraft named after him. The engines roared to life, a dragon’s breath igniting the path to the stars, and as the ship pierced through the atmosphere, a banner unfurled silently back on Earth, bearing the words, “Dare to Name, Dare to Dream.”

In the hush that followed the launch, a realization settled softly upon the world like the first snow. Names, imbued with hope and vision, could indeed be the compasses guiding humanity not just across the dark seas of doubt and tradition, but into the bright, uncharted spaces of tomorrow.

And somewhere, in the interstellar silence, a beacon named Quasar Hyperloop Clarkson blazed a trail into the unknown, a testament to the power of names, dreams, and the unyielding human spirit to reach beyond the confines of the Earth and into the vast, starry embrace of the cosmos.

The surprise, however, was yet to come. For upon Quasar’s return, Earth awaited a revelation that would once again tilt the axis of the mundane. Quasar introduced to the world a companion from the stars, a testament to the universality of connection and the boundless potential of exploration. The message was clear: the universe, in its infinite expansiveness, was ready for humanity, so long as we dared to dream, to reach, and to name the unknown with hope and courage.

Thus, the Clarkson legacy, encapsulated in the name Quasar Hyperloop, became not just a chapter in humanity’s ascent to the stars but a symbol of boundless potential, of the courage to embrace the unknown with open hearts and daring dreams. And in the annals of history, the tale of a boy named after the cosmos and his journey into the heart of it would be retold, inspiring generations to cast their gaze upward, toward the stars, armed with the audacity to dream big, name bravely, and explore the uncharted with hope as their compass.

Beyond the Celestial Veil

Explore a world unraveling after a man-made eclipse in 'Beyond the Celestial Veil' - a tale of conspiracy, fear, and the unknown.

The news came down in a flurry of frantic texts and social media chaos. Not an alien invasion, thankfully, but something altogether more bizarre: the world’s governments had successfully pulled off a man-made eclipse. Apparently, they’d been working on it for years, a top-secret project shrouded in enough conspiracy theories to make your head spin. Now, here we were, staring down the barrel of a meticulously orchestrated celestial blackout. 

I, for one, was more concerned with the state of my fridge than the fate of the universe. My roommate, Gary, a man whose enthusiasm for conspiracy theories rivaled his love for expired yogurt, was practically vibrating with excitement.  

“Dude,” he hissed, his eyes wide with a manic glint, “they’re blocking the sun! This is HUGE! They’re rewriting the laws of physics as we speak!”

“Or,” I countered, peering into the fridge’s meager offerings, “they’re just giving us an excuse to eat questionable leftovers in the dark.”

Gary scoffed. “Don’t be such a cynic, Mark. This is a paradigm shift! A new era! We could see things we’ve never seen before, stuff the naked eye can’t handle!”

I wasn’t entirely convinced. The whole thing smacked of a publicity stunt gone rogue. Still, the prospect of a literal darkness settling over the world held a certain morbid allure.  

The countdown began at precisely 3:14 pm. We camped out on the balcony, Gary sporting a pair of those ridiculous eclipse glasses that looked like something out of a bad sci-fi movie.  

The world started to dim, an unsettling twilight creeping in at the edges of vision. Birdsong died down, replaced by an eerie quiet. It was as if the entire planet was holding its breath.  

Then, the moment arrived. A jagged shadow, the manufactured maw of the eclipse, bit into the sun. A gasp escaped Gary’s lips. I squinted through my makeshift filter – a colander, courtesy of Gary’s boundless ingenuity. 

There, in the inky black, a sight unlike anything I’d ever witnessed unfolded. A swirling vortex of what looked like pure energy pulsed and throbbed within the sun’s corona. It pulsed with a rhythm, a heartbeat of the universe itself. 

“Holy…” Gary choked, his voice a strangled whisper.

The spectacle was mesmerizing, terrifying. It felt like peering into the very core of existence, a place where the rules blurred and reason teetered on the edge.  

Then, just as abruptly as it began, it ended. The world lurched back into light, the oppressive darkness lifting. Birdsong resumed, a chaotic symphony of chirps and calls. 

We sat in stunned silence for a long moment, the weight of what we’d just seen settling on us like a physical thing. 

“So,” Gary finally croaked, his voice hoarse, “what do we do now?” 

I shrugged, a strange hollowness settling in my stomach. “Beats me,” I said. “But one thing’s for sure, the world just got a whole lot weirder.”

The question hung in the air, unanswered. The man-made eclipse had cast a long shadow, not just on the sky, but on our sense of reality itself. 

The following days were a whirlwind of speculation and unease. Social media exploded with theories about the purpose of the eclipse, ranging from the plausible (studying solar anomalies) to the downright outlandish (communication with extraterrestrial beings). News channels ran endless debates featuring talking heads spouting jargon and half-truths. 

Gary, predictably, dove headfirst into the conspiracy rabbit hole. He spent hours glued to his laptop, eyes bloodshot from the relentless screen glare, deciphering cryptic messages hidden within government press releases. 

“Mark,” he declared one morning, brandishing a crumpled piece of paper with a triumphant flourish, “they’re hiding something! This eclipse wasn’t just about science. It was a warning!”

“A warning about what?” I asked, skepticism lacing my voice.  

“They woke something up,” he said, his voice low and urgent. “Something ancient, something they can’t control.” 

I rolled my eyes. “Gary, come on. There’s no evidence…” 

He slammed the paper on the table, his finger jabbing at a highlighted section. “Look at this! Increased seismic activity around dormant volcanoes. Animal migrations on an unprecedented scale. These are all signs! The Earth is reacting!”

Despite myself, a shiver ran down my spine. The news reports had mentioned the unusual animal behavior, but I’d dismissed it as a random occurrence. Now, coupled with the volcanic activity, it felt unsettling. 

The days turned into weeks, and the unease grew. The initial excitement over the man-made eclipse had been replaced by a pervasive sense of foreboding. Strange occurrences started cropping up – reports of glowing lights dancing across night skies, whispers of messages broadcasted in unknown languages on shortwave radio frequencies. 

One particularly stormy night, the power went out. We huddled in the living room, the only light flickering from the dying embers of a hastily lit fireplace. Gary, surprisingly subdued, kept glancing nervously out the rain-streaked window. 

Suddenly, a loud boom echoed through the night, shaking the very foundation of the house. We scrambled to our feet, hearts pounding. Another boom followed, closer this time, accompanied by a low, guttural growl that seemed to vibrate through the earth itself. 

Gary stared at me, his eyes wide with terror. “It’s here,” he whispered. 

Panic clawed at my throat. What “it” was, I didn’t know, but its arrival sent a primal fear coursing through me.  

We spent the rest of the night huddled together, listening to the unearthly sounds that punctuated the storm. By morning, the power had returned, but the unsettling calm that hung in the air was far more terrifying. 

The news channels were finally admitting they didn’t have all the answers. The man-made eclipse, a supposed feat of human ingenuity, had unraveled something far beyond our understanding. 

As the weeks bled into months, the world became a stranger, more fantastical and frightening with each passing day. The initial, isolated reports of strange phenomena morphed into a constant barrage of bizarre occurrences. Glowing cracks appeared in the Earth’s crust, pulsing with an eerie inner light. Animals mutated, growing grotesque appendages and exhibiting impossible behaviors. The very fabric of reality seemed to be fraying at the edges.

Gary, ever the conspiracy theorist, was strangely calm amidst the chaos. He’d taken on a messianic air, spouting cryptic pronouncements about a coming dimensional shift and the awakening of an ancient slumbering entity. While I scoffed initially, a part of me couldn’t help but be drawn to his unwavering certainty in a world that had gone utterly mad.

One morning, I awoke to a message scrawled across the living room wall in what looked like glowing red paint. It wasn’t a language I recognized, but it sent a jolt of primal fear through me. Gary, staring at the message with an awestruck expression, claimed it was a sign, an invitation.

“An invitation to what?” I demanded, my voice laced with a tremor I couldn’t control.

“To join them,” he said, his eyes gleaming with a strange light. “They’re here to usher in a new era, a melding of dimensions. We have a choice, Mark. Embrace it or be left behind.”

The idea of willingly stepping into whatever madness was unfolding outside was terrifying, but the alternative, a world teetering on the brink of oblivion, wasn’t much better. Days turned into a tense stand-off. Gary, increasingly erratic, spent his nights deciphering the cryptic message, while I wrestled with a burgeoning sense of helplessness.

Then, one night, the sky above our city split open, revealing a swirling vortex of unimaginable colors. Tendrils of energy snaked down from the tear, reaching for the Earth like grasping appendages. Panic surged through me. This was it. The moment Gary had been waiting for, the moment I dreaded.

As the tendrils neared the ground, a wave of pure energy washed over me. I felt a tingling sensation course through my body, a sense of being stretched and pulled in all directions. My vision blurred, the world dissolving into a kaleidoscope of colors.

When my vision cleared, I found myself standing in a place that defied description. It wasn’t Earth, but something else entirely. A strange, shimmering landscape bathed in an otherworldly light stretched before me. Towering structures of impossible geometries pierced the sky, and figures, unlike anything I’d ever seen, moved about with an unsettling grace.

But what truly sent a jolt of terror through me was seeing Gary, standing amongst them, a triumphant grin plastered on his face. As his gaze met mine, a sudden flicker of recognition passed through his eyes, followed by a chilling smile.

“Welcome, brother,” he said, his voice distorted, alien. “Welcome to the new world.”  

The world spun as the implications hit me. Gary hadn’t been a prophet; he’d been a pawn. And I, caught in the web of his delusions, had unwittingly become one too.  

The man-made eclipse, a supposed feat of human ingenuity, had become our undoing. We’d opened a door we couldn’t close, and in the process, handed over our world to beings beyond our comprehension. 

The once comforting cynicism that had been my shield now felt like a betrayal. In the face of the unimaginable, my skepticism had failed me. Trapped in a reality I couldn’t even begin to understand, I could only stare at the warped figure of my former friend and wonder at the terrible price we’d paid for a glimpse beyond the veil.

Chronicles of the Office Time-Traveler

Embark on a hilarious journey with the office time-traveler, blending workplace antics and historical escapades. Will his time-hopping antics unravel? Find out now!

Here I am, stuck in the daily grind, pushing papers like a champ. But guess what? I’ve got a secret superpower: or so I thought. You see, I believed I could time travel. I’d be sitting at my desk, pretending to be the model employee, and then, bam! I’d decide to chill with the dinosaurs. Close my eyes, wish real hard, and bam! Suddenly, I’m surrounded by oversized reptiles. It’s a Jurassic party, and I’m the uninvited guest.

The best part? No one at the office even notices. I’m like the Houdini of the corporate world. I’m gone, exploring the wonders of history, and back before anyone realizes I’ve disappeared. It’s like I never left. My boss probably thinks I’m the most dedicated employee ever, little does he know I’m actually a time-traveling ninja.

One day, feeling adventurous, I decide to visit ancient Rome. Strolling around the Colosseum, high-fiving gladiators and dodging stray lions. But then, the unthinkable happens—I get stuck. Something goes wonky with my time-traveling watch, and I’m stranded in togas and sandals.

Panicking? You betcha. I’m stuck in ancient Rome, and my boss probably thinks I’m just taking an extra-long bathroom break. I can already hear the HR department preparing my pink slip.

Days turn into weeks, and weeks into months. I try everything to fix my time-traveling gadget, but it’s as uncooperative as a cat in a bathtub. I’ve become a permanent feature in a history that isn’t mine.

Meanwhile, back at the office, my coworkers are carrying on as usual. They probably figured I finally snapped from the monotony and decided to take an extended vacation. Little do they know, I’m stuck with a bunch of Romans who don’t speak English, and chariot Uber hasn’t been invented yet.

I’ve become a historical hermit, the guy who never made it back to the present. It’s a lonely existence, but hey, at least I can brag about being the only person who got fired for time traveling.

One day, I wake up to find myself back at my desk. Confused and disoriented, I look around, realizing that I’m not in ancient Rome. My coworkers give me puzzled looks, wondering why I’m staring at my computer screen like I’ve seen a ghost.

Then it hits me—my time-traveling adventures were nothing but dreams. I wasn’t exploring history; I was falling asleep at my desk. The narcolepsy that I never knew I had decided to make an appearance, turning my workdays into a bizarre mix of reality and dreams.

So, the next time you think your job is a drag, just remember: at least you’re not confusing reality with ancient Rome because of an undiagnosed sleep disorder.



The Fattening of Mr. Jones

In the pursuit of love, Mrs. Jones takes a drastic step to keep her husband, Mr. Jones, by her side forever. A gripping story of sacrifice, consequences, and the true meaning of love.

Mr. Jones was a handsome man, with a charming smile and a fit body. He worked as a salesman for a company that sold kitchen appliances, and he was very good at his job. He could persuade any housewife to buy a new toaster, a blender, or a microwave oven with his smooth talk and his dazzling grin.

Mrs. Jones was a plain woman, with a dull expression and a thin frame. She worked as a cashier at a grocery store, and she was very bad at her job. She often made mistakes with the change, the coupons, or the receipts, and she had to endure the complaints of the customers and the scolding of the manager.

Mr. and Mrs. Jones had been married for five years, and they lived in a small apartment in the suburbs. They had no children, no pets, and no friends. They had nothing in common, except for one thing: they loved each other very much.

Mrs. Jones loved Mr. Jones more than anything in the world. She loved his handsome face, his fit body, and his charming smile. She loved the way he kissed her, hugged her, and made her feel special. She loved the way he brought home gifts for her, like flowers, chocolates, or jewelry. She loved the way he told her stories about his work, his travels, and his dreams.

But Mrs. Jones also feared Mr. Jones more than anything in the world. She feared that he would leave her, cheat on her, or forget about her. She feared that he would find another woman, more beautiful, more smart, or more fun than her. She feared that he would realize that he deserved better than her, and that he would break her heart.

So Mrs. Jones decided to do something to keep Mr. Jones by her side forever. She decided to make him fat.

She started by cooking him large and delicious meals every day, with plenty of butter, cream, cheese, and sugar. She baked him pies, cakes, cookies, and brownies for dessert. She packed him sandwiches, chips, candy, and soda for lunch. She bought him ice cream, popcorn, pizza, and beer for snacks. She praised him for his appetite, and encouraged him to eat more and more.

Mr. Jones did not suspect anything. He thought that his wife was just being kind and generous. He enjoyed the food, and he thanked her for her efforts. He did not notice that his clothes were getting tighter, his belt was getting shorter, and his buttons were getting harder to close. He did not notice that his face was getting rounder, his belly was getting bigger, and his chin was getting double. He did not notice that his breath was getting shorter, his steps were getting slower, and his energy was getting lower.

He only noticed that his wife was getting happier, and he was happy too.

Mrs. Jones was delighted with the results of her plan. She watched with satisfaction as her husband grew fatter and fatter. She knew that no other woman would find him attractive, and that he would not cheat on her. She knew that he would depend on her, and that he would not leave her. She knew that he would love her, and that he would not forget her.

She only forgot one thing: the health of her husband.

One day, Mr. Jones had a heart attack. He collapsed on the floor of his office, clutching his chest and gasping for air. His co-workers called an ambulance, and he was rushed to the hospital. The doctors told him that he had to lose weight, or he would die. They put him on a strict diet, and they gave him pills, injections, and machines to help him.

Mrs. Jones was devastated. She blamed herself for what had happened. She realized that she had been selfish, foolish, and cruel. She realized that she had not loved her husband, but only possessed him. She realized that she had not made him happy, but only miserable. She realized that she had not saved him, but only killed him.

She begged him for forgiveness, and he forgave her. He told her that he still loved her, and that he wanted to live with her. He told her that he would do anything to get better, and that he would follow the doctor’s orders. He told her that he would lose weight, and that he would be handsome again.

But he never did.

He died a few weeks later, in his hospital bed, with his wife by his side. He died with a smile on his face, and a tear in his eye. He died with love in his heart, and regret in his soul.

He died, and he left her alone.



Tales from the Aisle: A Dog’s Hardware Adventures

In 'Tales from the Aisle,' A Dog's Hardware Adventures unfold – a heartwarming journey of a dog's rebellion, love, and unexpected humor.

Ever since I was a little boy, I dreamed of having a dog of my own. I loved dogs of all shapes and sizes, but I had a soft spot for chocolate labs. They were so adorable, with their brown fur, floppy ears, and sweet eyes. I imagined playing fetch with them, cuddling with them, and taking them for walks.

But my parents never let me have a dog. They said they were too much work, too expensive, and too messy. They said I had to wait until I was older and had my own place. So I waited, and waited, and waited.

Finally, when I was 25, I moved out of my parents’ house and bought a small house. It wasn’t much, but it was mine. And I could have all the pets I ever wanted. I was so excited. I started looking for chocolate lab puppies online, hoping to find one that needed a home.

I was lucky. I found an ad for a litter of chocolate lab puppies that were born on a farm nearby. The owner said they were healthy, vaccinated, and ready to go. He said he had one male left, and he was the cutest of the bunch. He sent me a picture, and I fell in love.

I drove to the farm the next day, eager to meet my new best friend. The owner greeted me and led me to a barn, where the puppies were playing. They were all adorable, but one stood out. He was the smallest but the most energetic. He ran up to me, licked my face, and wagged his tail. He looked at me with his big brown eyes, and I knew he was the one.

I picked him up and hugged him. He snuggled into my arms and made a happy sound. The owner smiled and said his name was Hershey because he looked like a candy bar. I thought it was a perfect name. I paid the owner, thanked him, and took Hershey to my car. He sat on my lap and looked out the window, curious about the world.

Hershey was a great dog. He was smart, loyal, and friendly. He learned how to sit, stay, fetch, and roll over in no time. He never barked at strangers, chewed on furniture, or ran away. He was always happy to see me, and he wagged his tail like crazy. He was my best friend, and I loved him more than anything.

There was only one problem. Hershey hated the hardware store.

I don’t know why, but every time I took him there, he would poop on the floor. And not just anywhere, but right in the middle of the main aisle. It was embarrassing, disgusting, and annoying. I had to apologize to the staff and clean up the mess, and I always walked out of there with my tail between my legs. Every single time.

I tried everything to stop him. I scolded him, praised him, bribed him, and ignored him. Nothing worked. He would poop on the floor as soon as we entered the store. He didn’t care about the other customers, the loud noises, or the weird smells. He just had to do his business.

It was a mystery to me. Hershey was fine everywhere else. He never pooped in the car, the park, the vet, or the pet store. He only did it at the hardware store. And always in the same spot.

One day, I decided to find out why. I took Hershey to the hardware store and waited for him to poop. As usual, he did it right away. As he was pooping, I looked around and noticed a plaque on the wall. It said:

“In memory of Bob Smith, who worked here for 25 years and hated every minute of it. Rest in peace, Bob.”

I was stunned. Could it be that Hershey was Bob’s reincarnation? Did he poop on the floor to express his resentment for his former job? Did he hate the hardware store as much as Bob did?

I decided to test my theory. I asked one of the staff members about Bob. He told me that Bob was an old man who worked as a cashier. He said Bob was always grumpy, rude, and lazy. He said Bob hated his job, his boss, his coworkers, and his customers. He said Bob died of a heart attack about a year ago, right in the middle of the main aisle.

I felt a chill. That was the exact spot where Hershey pooped. It was too much of a coincidence. Hershey had to be Bob’s reincarnation. He pooped on the floor to get back at his old boss, his old coworkers, and his old life. He was a rebel, a prankster, and a genius.

I decided to respect his wishes. I never took him to the hardware store again. I let him poop wherever he wanted, as long as it wasn’t in my house. I loved him for who he was, not who he used to be.

Hershey was a great dog. He was smart, loyal, and friendly. And he had a tremendous sense of humor.



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